Wise Women of the West

Johnny Otis and Etta James - The Soundtrack of my Life

2012-01-21T10:58:00.000-08:00

This week two icons passed away within days of each other. Johnny Otis and Etta James...As they play their music on KPFA, I find myself sobbing. I always adored "With Every Beat of My Heart". My preference was for the version by the Royals. I didn't know Otis wrote it! This morning I heard the story of why.
Johnny was one of those people who just kept going. Present and steady, yet ever-changing. A truly unique man who was not afraid to walk his talk or step out of the box.

I only saw him once in person in Santa Rosa playing with his family members. I was confused! He looked White! I thought he was Black! His kids were clearly of mixed race. It didn't matter, of course, it's just that after years of hearing a voice...and making an assumption, I was surprised. But then, that was the nature of the man. He encouraged you to look at your assumptions, change your attitudes. It was empowering.

Who would expect a band leader, musician - a guy who hung out in nightclubs and bars to make a living, etc...to be an organic farmer and cook?

Or to be such a family man? The fact that he performed with his children and grand-children was a testament to his success as a parent. I could hear his love for humanity in his voice on the radio. He will be missed.

Etta James..Otis discovered her - died 2 days after him. She sang another one of those songs from my childhood that affected my ideas about love - "At Last". I didn't know much about her except that I liked her music. We didn't get all the details about people lives like we do today.

Listening to their music in the last couple of days, I realize how much it affected me. I have always found it interesting that people get imprinted with the music that is popular when their sex hormones kick in. Somehow, that becomes the 'soundtrack' of love, sex and intimacy. And it was no different for me.

No matter how old and senile someone gets, they still know all the words to those songs. It's amazing really. They become embedded at a deep level in our hearts and souls.

The fact that these two died within days of each other, he at 90, she at 73, shows that their souls were connected. I can see Johnny leading the band, while Etta stands at the mike in the great nightclub in the sky. Keep singing....

Unlocking the Pyramid Code: Ancient Egypt as a Model for Empowerment

2012-01-01T15:32:00.000-08:00

We have been viewing this series at Songbird since November 27. Two session remain - one January 8th and the final one on January 15th. Livestream interviews between Dr. Carmen Boulter and experts on some aspect of ancient Egyptian language, culture, art, technology, etc. An amazing series.

I first became interested in the ancient Egyptians (in this lifetime) when I saw a movie called "Land of the Pharaohs" at the drive-in with my parents. I must have been around 5 or 6 years old - whenever that film came out and it resonated with me. Coupled with my visits to museums, it rekindled past life memories. I was hooked.

I finally got to go to Egypt in 1997 with one of my Sufi teachers. I am so grateful that I went in this way, since we went in reverence, praying in each temple and seeking the roots of Sufism. I had many amazing experiences in the temples, especially Dendera, Philae and in the Great Pyramid.

Since that trip, I have had more past -life recall about my role there...at least in a few lifetimes. So this series has been especially significant to me.

Visit my blogs on herbalism, astrology and the Maya to see what else I'm into.

I recommend this Evolver Intensives series and although there are only a couple of session remaining, you can purchase them by clicking here.

Here's what the Evolver Intensive website says about Christopher Dunn and his work:

"Did the ancient Egyptians use an energy technology more advanced than our own? After learning of the Great Pyramid's precision and design characteristics, Christopher Dunn proposed that this edifice may have had an original purpose that differed from conventional opinion. Further research led Chris to conclude that it was originally built to provide a highly technical society with energy -- in short, it was a very large machine. Discovering the purpose of this machine and documenting his case took the better part of twenty years of research, culminating in the 1998 publication of Chris’s book, The Giza Power Plant: Technologies of Ancient Egypt, which describes a holistic energy device that is harmonically coupled with the Earth and its inhabitants.

Chris is also author of Lost Technologies of Ancient Egypt: Advanced Engineering in the Temples of the Pharaohs. His work has been referenced and quoted in books such as Graham Hancock's Fingerprints of the Gods, Colin Wilson's From Atlantis to the Sphinx, and Joseph P. Farrell's Giza Death Star Trilogy. He has appeared on PAX Television, the Travel Channel, Discovery Channel, The Learning Channel, Lifetime Television and most recently on the History Channel in the Ancient Alien episode ‘The Evidence’.

n this session, Carmen and Chris will discuss:

Concrete evidence of high level technology in ancient Egypt
Mechanics of how the Great Pyramid could have functioned as a power plant for free energy
Lost technologies of ancient Egypt
News behind Gantenbrink’s door in the shaft inside the Great Pyramid"

Then on January 15th William Henry!
Again from the website:

"William Henry brought to the world’s attention a truly amazing discovery: the symbolism used by the ancient Egyptians to depict their gods traveling the stars matches illustrations used by modern science to symbolize stargate and wormholes. Stargates or wormholes are cosmic gateways that theoretically link regions of the universe millions of light years apart and allow nearly instantaneous communication between these regions. Could the abilities of the ancient Egyptians be pointing us toward the innovations of tomorrow?

William Henry is an author, investigative mythologist, host of Revelations radio, and guide into the transformative power of art and symbols of human ascension. He has been documenting humanity’s awakening to its spiritual magnificence for over 20 years. Inspired by the great accomplishments of antiquity, William brings the evidence of our divinity. By bringing to life the stories of ascension through art, he teaches the secrets of soul transfiguration or metamorphosis and connects people to one another across cultures, time and space. William is currently co-authoring a video book with our host, Dr Carmen Boulter.

In this session, Carmen and William will discuss:

The science of stargates and the evidence in temples of a superior science
The transformative power of symbols in ancient Egypt
The secrets of light body activation
Decoding the cosmic storyboard at Temple of Hathor at Dendera"

My Thoughts on the Occupy Movement

2011-11-08T11:56:00.000-08:00

The other day on KPFA I finally heard someone speak the truth. He said that for Blacks in the South (and elsewhere in this country), the American Dream has always been the American Nightmare. He said that the only reason we are having all these "Occupies" is because White people are finally having their dreams smashed. White youth can't get jobs despite their college degrees. They have big student loans they can't pay. They believe that their dreams will not come true. People of color have always been in this boat...and no one cared. According to this guy, the people in the streets are upset because they will not become rich like the 1%. Feeling entitled, they are angry because it will not happen.

Although I an not officially a woman of color, I too, have felt outside the restaurant looking in because I am 'not white enough.' Coming from a bilingual, bi cultural southern European family, and looking 'ethnic' has put me in a no-man's-land of not being a minority and thus eligible for special programs, but being treated like one in many ways. I have not gotten jobs I was qualified for because they had to hire a minority despite the fact that the person was not at all qualified. I once dated a man for a short time, who broke it off because I was 'too ethnic looking' and he could not completely accept me.

For me the dream has been the American Fantasy. I am educated. I have a Masters degree, nearly 2, in fact, and worked on a doctorate. I have certificates, credentials and a lot of training. I have not gotten jobs because I was 'overqualified'. On the other hand, since a couple of my degrees were at State Universities rather than private or Ivy-league schools, I have been considered 'not as smart' as others. I worked my way through college and finished my masters with no debt. But this is what 'working class' people do....not the rich. I have been looked-down on for that. My academic advisor in my doctoral program said I did not have my 'priorities straight' when I told her I had to work full-time rather than working on my dissertation. She did not understand that there were no parents or spouse supporting me.

I have basically been 'under-employed' for 22 years. While I may have been working, I was a seasonal, temporary, or part-time person at California Department of Parks and Recreation for 7 years, at the U.S.
Postal Service for 7 years.....Thus, no benefits, no retirement, no medical...no security. When I got hit by a truck and could no longer deliver mail, they terminated me. I was often the second choice at a interview. But since there was only one position, second was not good enough.

Capitalism has always been a system where a few people make money off the backs of others...slaves or low-wage earners. Globalization is not new either. Capitalists have always sought the cheapest source of
goods, the lowest labor costs....the ever-growing market. It doesn't mean it's right. Every so often, the folks rebel. Things change a little, but because the capitalists control the sources of all things the folks need...protests don't last long or are squashed. In the past, the protesters were simply killed. End of protest. Capitalists shrugged their shoulders and carried on.

I have been listening to the radio which has been covering all the 'Occupy' events. Many people speak about how great it is that 'people are working together, feeding each other, taking care of medical and housing needs'. Well, we'll see how long this lasts. The diversity that exists in this culture means that we do not share the same values. In fact, this is the area where there the most diversity. Sharing and giving only works over time, when people have integrity. If they eat for free, they do something in return - child care, cleaning, helping out in some way. But in this country, few people have integrity.

Individuals need to examine themselves. Could they function without their iPads, cars, expensive bikes, Whole Foods....? Living in the land of privilege and entitlement...it is a 'lark' to protest - be out there in the streets with the homeless. Just like most of the 'hippies' that arrived in San Francisco during the Summer of Love, they had their trust funds behind them. They had their safety net. They could just cut their hair, take a bath, change clothes and go home. My friends and I, coming from working class backgrounds, knew that if we quit our jobs at the car wash and hitchhiked to SF we would probably die in the street. No one would/could rescue us.

Now, many of those 'hippies' are wealthy entrepreneurs, business owners etc. They used their parents' money and property to build organic farms, herb schools, healing centers, and other types of 'alternative'
businesses. Fine. Good use of the money. Better than other choices. But make no mistake. They came from people with money. They were not working class or poor. Today they are famous and well-off. They still
run things. Now they use 'interns' to do the work free. It is not called slavery anymore because they volunteer for it.

How many of the people in the streets today HAVE to be there because they have no other choice? How about taking the homeless home? Rather than playing at being homeless....true caring would be to bring them
home. Have them live with you in your house - FREE. See how long that would last. Hanging out with the homeless in the street for awhile is one thing, but truly helping them by giving them your bed is another.

Examine your conscience. What is the TRUTH? Are you really living hand-to-mouth? Why? Don't get me wrong...I know the 1% controls this country and the world. But I am not stupid. I have always known this.
It is not a big surprise. Can it change? Not sure and have no idea what it would look like. Forty years ago, I set my priorities. I am living with the choices I made. And it is not easy. My conscience is clear. I know I did not cause the problems in the world. I have lived close to the bottom "so I would not have far to fall" when things got worse. I knew this day was coming.

History shows us that there has almost always been economic disparity - coinciding with the concept of private property. And that occurred when people developed agriculture and men realized they had something
to do with procreation. When men knew they helped make a baby and started accumulating stuff due to settled life and agriculture, they wanted to keep their stuff - women, children and cows.Women were considered chattel until about 150 years ago in the West. A man's property. I don't know enough about the rest of the world, but I suspect it's not that different. By controlling women and their issue, they passed their stuff on to their sons. Amassing more and more wealth in a family.

This has been going on for at least 5000 years, maybe more. So....the job of 'changing things' is a big one. It is programmed into our genes. In fact, our genetic makeup probably is directly connected to this idea of private property. 'Survival of the fittest' is/was the battle cry of the robber barons at the beginning of the 20th century and Wall Street types today.

Of course, if/when Mother Earth has her turn, the 'fittest' may be defined differently. Perhaps the most resilient and resourceful will be the survivors. Probably the homeless. They already know how to survive with nothing.

To see what else I'm up to go to my herb blog my astrology blog and my 2012 blog

In honor of my 100th post on this blog - for love of learning

2011-10-10T17:22:00.000-07:00

Recently I did a talk on the Maya at the local museum as part of a series on 2012. It was the most well- attended of all the presentations - nearly 70 people came, crowding in to a small stuffy room to hear the about ancient Maya inscriptions etc.

Apparently an ex-President of the Museum had a fit about it. I was asked by the current President, to write a letter to the local newspaper about my perspective on the role of a museum.

One of the attributes of a vital museum in a community is that it responds to the needs and interests of that community. Look at the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco - the de Young and the Legion of Honor. In an effort to serve their community, they have instituted free evenings on major exhibits so that they serve not
only their members who can afford to attend and support events, but also the working class and poor who cannot.

Even exhibits which normally cost up to 25.00 are free on Friday nights. Why? Are they losing money doing this? Well, if the health of the museum depends on the community, people will not support something they don't value. Not being able to go to museums because they are too expensive or cater to a select few, people will not care for them, allocate funds for them or set priorities in their favor. If they don't matter, they will cease to exist.

My mother started taking me to museums when I was quite young. For me, the old de Young was like church. What I learned there led to nearly all the things I have do and have done in my life. I developed an interest in other cultures, which led to degrees in Anthropology and Linguistics, serving as a Peace Corps volunteer
in Zaire, teaching English as a Second Language to Vietnamese refugees.

I loved the old exhibits they had on women's fashion through the ages, which led to my hobbies: knitting, embroidery, crocheting and sewing. As a teenager, I made all my own clothes. These days, I donate my creations to charity.

I loved the room exhibits at the old de Young where they reconstructed whole rooms taken from historic buildings. I was fascinated by furniture, textiles, carpets, ceramics...all of it.

While working at the Office of Preservation at the Library of Congress and pursuing a degree in Rare Book Librarianship at Catholic University, I studied Museum Conservation at the Smithsonian. This led to an interest in Museum Curatorship.

Later, while working at the California Department of Parks and Recreation, I worked on the exhibits at the Petaluma Adobe, the Benicia Capitol and Fischer-Hanlon House, the Vallejo Home and Jack London State Historic Park. My eclectic interests and skills were stimulated and fostered by museum exhibits and programs. They often led me to pursue more training.

While living in Washington, D.C. I was a Smithsonian Associate. I took classes in book-binding, paper making, calligraphy. I developed skills I have used throughout my professional and personal life. I was able to design and write my own wedding invitations using Copperplate script. Later as a graduate student at Tulane University I worked on the illustrations for a book by one of my professors on Mayan Hieroglyphs because I had developed skills gained through these museum programs.

While a doctoral student at Tulane, I worked as Director of Educational Programs at the Maritime Museum in New Orleans.

To summarize: Museums have an important role to play in the education process. For seniors they provide entertainment, recreation, socialization. For adults, they serve as a source of continuing education. For children they are in the unique position to shape young minds in immeasurable ways. You can never know
how a child's mind will be stimulated leading to careers, hobbies, volunteer activities, and recreation.

If the Petaluma Museum hopes to be seen as a vital, progressive source of experience and educational opportunities, it must be willing to provide diverse opportunities.

Tradition has its value, and believe me, no one values history more than I do - I worked at several State Historic Parks, developing exhibits and programs and training docents, but the Petaluma Museum has a wider role. Otherwise, it would still house the old library. It's founder, Andrew Carnegie, saw the need for
continuing community education, when he established the system of libraries throughout the State of California. The library outgrew the facility which was then given a new role. Ultimately, the Petaluma Museum could/should outgrow the building. But, in order to expand, its vision has to expand.

The unique history of Petaluma is fascinating. I worked at Olompali SHP which was part of the chicken farming history of the area. This should not be overlooked or forgotten. It has its place in local history. Permanent exhibits on that topic are appropriate. But in order to expand membership, bring in more
visitors, generate income and fulfill its role as an educational institution, the Museum has to be willing to respond to a diversity of needs and interests. This can be accomplished through programs such as the Speakers Program, visiting exhibits etc. on a diversity of topics.

Museum Hopping by the Bay

2011-08-09T10:13:00.000-07:00

One of my friends took me to an exhibit at the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art. "The Steins Collect Matisse, Picasso and the Parisian Avant-Garde." A collection of paintings and sculpture collected by the Stein family at the beginning of the 20th century. The exhibit included writings, furniture, photographs and personal effects of the family. I learned that Gertrude Stein (before she was famous) and her siblings had moved to Paris, began buying art from then unknowns and displaying it in their home. Eventually they had to expand to three apartments, since each sibling collected different artists and there was no more room to display it all in one place. They opened their homes to the 'public' to show the paintings and hosted salons of those interested in discussing art etc. Clearly they had the money to move from the Bay Area to Paris, buy the art and show it...they did not have to work at anything else. Eventually they became artists and writers and famous themselves.

What they bought was considered outrageous and worthless at the time, but somehow they understood the significance it would someday have. Now.. the art they collected is priceless.

They did it because they were fascinated with it...because at the time it was of no value at all. In fact, they helped to make it famous so much so that within a few years, they could no longer afford it themselves. They popularized the art to such an extent they priced themselves out of the market.

The family, once close, develop schisms, partly due to their ideas about art, partly due to Gertrude's relationship with Alice B. Toklas, which did not fit into the Victorian ideas that were still extant in society.

Their collections became the basis for collections of many art museums. They had a huge impact on the modern art movement. Among the artists they collected at an early stage: Matisse, Picasso, Cezanne, Renoir, Toulouse-Lautrec and others.

The exhibit runs until September 6. It's a huge exhibit, so be prepared for hours of viewing or multiple visits. I could not see it all nor take it all in at one time. Have to go again.

The next day we went to the Oakland Museum. We happened to be there for the member's only preview of the John Muir exhibit. Another day of revelation. Just out of sheer interest and love, John Muir studied the Yosemite Valley and parts of Alaska, collecting plant and animal samples, making incredible drawings, writing his journals, recording information of all types. It appears he was on a spiritual quest, with Nature as his guru.

As per the Oakland Museum's mission, there were many opportunities to do 'hands on' activities. You could try to draw birds, record your own and listen to others' reactions to the exhibit. For me, one delightful addition to the exhibit that I have NEVER seen before, was aromatherapy! They actually had the scents of the individual plants, the forest and other natural settings. Push a button and smell the woods, the trees, the meadow etc. A wonderful addition. Another special feature of the exhibit is that you can listen to the recorded sounds of birds and other wildlife. There were places where you can take pictures of yourself 'climbing a mountain' or 'scaling a glacier" then email the picture to yourself.

What struck me about both these exhibits of 'famous' people, is that they did what they did out of love for the thing itself. For it's own sake. Not to be rich or famous. That was not their intent. There was no guarantee that anything would come of it. They didn't care about that - they did it anyway. Today people need guarantees. They need to know that any action they take with be 'successful'. Hence, they don't do things for the sheer love of the activity. They want to 'make money' 'be famous' 'be successful' and rarely follow their dreams or their heart. Often people reach old age after years of work and a modicum of financial stability feeling their lives have been a waste because they never did what they wanted to do.

How many people collect unpopular art because they like it? Or hike into wilderness recording everything they see because they love nature and want to understand it?

Most of us live lives of "quiet desperation" (Thoreau) rather than what Jack London aspired towards:

I would rather be ashes than dust!
I would rather
that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze
than it should be stifled by dryrot.
I would rather be a superb meteor,
every atom of me in magnificent glow,
than a sleepy and permanent planet.
The proper function of man is to live, not to exist.
I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them.
I shall use my time.

Looking at Jack London's life, we can see that he walked his talk. Let us dare to do something because we love it...no other reason. Let us not be satisfied with mere existing.

What Were They Thinking?

2011-03-15T12:48:00.000-07:00

I find it completely insane that a country which suffered first hand the negative effects of atomic power, ever even considered relying on nuclear energy on an island whose history has been one of recurrent earthquakes and volcanoes. What were they thinking?

No, I don't think they deserve it or any such thing. It just goes to show how greedy and short-sighted the corporations have become. For surely, it was some corporation with its power to control the government and the people, which suggested and pushed through this construction that now threatens millions.

This proves that we have truly lost our way. Capitalism and the endless search for markets, products and profits is completely bankrupt. Now the infrastructures are collapsing. The ocean was ruined last year by BP, now the air will be tainted with nuclear fall-out. Where will it end?

I did hear something encouraging this morning on KPFA. Germany and France are voluntarily shutting down their older nuclear power plants so that they can be inspected BEFORE they fail. Imagine!

The title of Naomi Klein's book "Shock Doctrine: The Rise of Disaster Capitalism" says it all. Corporations and even governments have figured out how to make money from disaster. Rather than 'losing it all', like we do, they continue to cash in. We need to put a stop to this.

We have arrived at a point where we don't fix anything until it fails. It's like never having your brakes serviced, then having an accident where you run over a child. Oops! We can do better than that. with so many people out of work, the government could do like they did in the Great Depression and hire people to repair the infrastructure, install alternative energy equipment (solar, wind). I heard that one week of the money we spend on the wars would take care of all the deficits.

When there is a disaster, people unite to help each other. We need to unite before the disaster, to prevent it.
Let's learn to be proactive, not reactive. We will feel so much better about ourselves.

A Great Movie - My Name is Khan

2010-09-07T12:41:00.000-07:00

Just watched, for the second time, a great movie called "My Name is Khan". I love this movie. This is one I want in my personal collection.

The movie is almost 3 hours long. I laughed, I cried - what else do you want from a movie? Beyond that, I thought a lot about my own beliefs and behavior.

The couple at the center of the movie are famous 'Bollywood' actors, who are usually singing and dancing away in an Indian romance. Here they have shown that their acting capacity is way beyond what they have previously done. The charisma between them is hypnotic.

The movie is about Rizwan Khan (Shahrukh Khan), a Muslim man with Asperger Syndrome, who lives happily with his wife Mandira (Kajol), in San Francisco until a tragedy drives her away after the 9/11 terrorist attacks. Now he is on a quest to recapture the heart of the woman he loves. Traveling across America, Rizwan faces prejudice because of his religion and unusual behavior, but he also inspires the people meets with this unique outlook on life.

Some lines from the movie will stick with me forever: "We used to designate history as BC or AD. Now there is a third event: 9/11."

The story reveals prejudices on all levels. Framed within the story of immigrants to America, it shows the misconceptions many of us have regarding 'foreigners' and how they themselves respond and react to our treatment of them.

It also educates regarding the religion of Islam in a subtle, but effective way. Not just telling us about the religion, but by example...the best way.

Because of his so-called 'disability' Rizwan has always been marginalized in every society he has lived in... including his original homeland - India. He as always been an outsider. This has given him a unique perspective. He can objectively see what others cannot - what is really important in life. We learn that just because a person has a 'disability', that does not mean they are not intelligent, sensitive, compassionate and highly capable. So it is also a movie about prejudices regarding disability.

Early in life, his mother demonstrated to him in a graphic way that there are only two kinds of people - good people who do good and bad people who do bad. He has never forgotten this important lesson. And that is what the movie is really about.

Not to be overlooked, is the love story between the two major characters. How Rizwan wins Mandira's love, then is forced to regain it after a tragedy.

This is a 'must see' for anyone who is concerned about the current trend to demonize Muslims and how we must always keep our minds and hearts open to people who are different from us.
Here's a link to the movie website.

This Time They Went Too Far...

2010-06-03T14:00:00.000-07:00

When I was a child my parents had bought me The Book of Knowledge, a type of encyclopedia. A photo I saw there so deeply affected me that I have never forgot it. I must have been around 5 years old. It was a pit full of emaciated bodies with a bulldozer pushing more bodies into it. I asked myself what was this about? How did this happen? I knew it was something horrible, but had no idea what. Through the years I found out.

As a pre-teen I was obsessed with reading books about the holocaust starting with The Diary of Anne Frank, which my mother had given me.I also developed a curiosity about Judaism and something in me resonated with this religion despite the fact that I was a Catholic. I was inexplicably drawn to it.

I began to notice words and practices within my Sicilian family that were not 'Catholic' nor 'Italian' but Jewish. My mother would merely say it was something grandma and grandpa brought from Sicily, period. I was curious about all this. Now I believe that my grandmother's family had been Jewish at some point in their history, but had been forced to convert way back when.

As an undergraduate, I studied the kibbutz educational system and wrote a term paper about it. Later in my graduate program in Linguistics, I chose Hebrew as my non-Indo-European language (all others in the program chose Japanese or Chinese). As it turned out, I was the only gentile in the class which was taught by an Israeli woman. She also taught us about the holidays, which we celebrated in class.

When I returned from the Peace Corps and lived in Washington, D.C., my best friend Connie was Jewish and we used to go to the Jewish Community Center dances where I hoped to find a husband.I planned to convert and fulfill my desire to be Jewish.

A few years ago, while pursuing a study of the religions of the world, my teacher told us that often while studying a religion in depth, one discovered such an attraction that it lead to a conversion of some sort. My first reaction was that I would become a Jew. That didn't happen.
Instead, I got attracted to Islam and studied Arabic.

I found out that my grandfather's family had been Muslim at some point in the past because the family name was not Italian, but Arabic. Sicily had been part of the Moorish kingdom, that Arabic was spoken in the court and in the church even after King Roger took power. That many words in the 'backwards' Sicilian dialect my grandparents spoke, were Arabic. I felt that I embodied the three religions: a Jewish soul, a Christian body and a Muslim heart.

But that is another story.

I heard about the concept that Jews who died during the holocaust had been reincarnated in non-Jewish bodies because there were not enough Jews. That there were many (of us, for I believed I was one of these people) who had 'Jewish souls' in Christian or other bodies. I totally resonated with this idea. After all, my name was Judith and I had always felt Jewish. I even discovered someone who I believed I had been. Although she had converted to Catholicism and was preparing to be a nun, she died in Auschwitz. I found out about her while at an Anthropology conference at the Carmelite convent in Santa Barbara (go figure). She had been calling to me. Her Nun name was Theresa and I had been hearing this name in my heart for months.

In the past, I was so proud that the State of Israel was founded a couple days from my birthday in May of 1948. I felt it was fated that I would become Jewish and go to Israel and live on a kibbutz.

I tell you all this to underscore the pain I feel about what Israel represents today. I feel they have become the abusers, like most victims of abuse. They learned from the Nazis. They are becoming better Nazis.
They stop any criticism by screaming anti-Semitism and try to halt any comment by Jewish people by accusing them of being 'self-hating Jews'. I admire Norman Finkelstein so much for having the guts to speak the truth.

This latest action of attacking the compassionate flotilla, is the last straw. They are a rogue state. They are the 'evil empire.' Now the world sees the truth of what they have become.

I am so glad I was not successful in becoming Jewish or finding a Jewish husband. I see that Jewish people are in a difficult situation. To criticize Israel can ruin your career, your life, and disrupt your family. Yet, not to criticize is to be complicit with criminal behavior.

When I first heard The Shema I was shaken to my core. As a Sufi minister, I always use it in the Universal Worship. It goes deeply into me every time I hear it and recite it. It is so beautiful and evocative.

Listen, Oh Israel, the Lord thy God is One. The Lord (Our God) is One. The God of the Jews, the God of the Christians and the God of the Muslims... IS ONE. Three religions from the root of Abraham! You are the self-hating Jews because you are killing your own family!

Where Do I Go From Here?

2010-04-09T14:14:00.000-07:00

You know you are over the hill when instead of wanting a resume of your achievements, they want a resume of all your illnesses and injuries. They want to have the cause and proof of your PTSD, rather than your success at keeping yourself out of addiction and despair.

They ask you to describe in detail every blow you have received from life and to promote your victimhood rather than your recovery and health.

After a half hour telephone interview the other day with my worker at Social Security, I was reduced to a quivering and helpless old lady.

In the past, at job interviews I extolled my talents and accomplishments in order to get the job (make money). Now I have to complain about all my aches and pains to get the disability insurance (make money). It was a real shock, believe me.

Something is very wrong with all this.

It occurred to me that I am tired of trying to convince anyone of anything. Take me as I am without the bragging or the excuses. This, to me, is the mark of my gained wisdom. But it will not get me anything in this world of skewed values.

If, 20 years ago after I was nearly beaten to death, stalked, forced to hide out in a battered women's shelter... I had become a drug addict, homeless person, felon, or alcoholic, I could have gotten more out of the system than I have as a person who has always sought wellness and wholeness.

Geez, by now I could have written a book about all my travails and gotten a movie contract. Instead, my intelligence has only served to make me 'over-qualified' for most jobs and envied by my fellow employees at others. Now, I have to use my intelligence to try to figure out what they need me to say to get disability. Pathetic!

What kind of world is this that rewards victimhood, crime and addiction? And where a person who has had the excuse to fall apart on many occasions has instead opted to stand up and try one more time, only to find out that falling apart pays better.

Haiti - Revive Your Indigenous Soul

2010-02-13T17:50:00.000-08:00

At the risk of alienating everyone I know and those loyal readers I do have... I must express myself about Haiti.

My first thought when I heard the news about Haiti was... if this had happened 200 years ago we wouldn't even know about it. All the people would die and that would be it. Hasn't this kind of thing happened throughout time all over the world, where whole cultures fell because of a cataclysmic volcanic eruption or earthquake which destroyed palaces and disrupted agriculture? Pompeii, the Minoan civilization. No one rushed off to help because no one knew. And....since the population was much lower in the past and people did not live is such density, fewer people died or were left homeless. A MILLION HOMELESS PEOPLE sitting around on the ground. What's going on here?

For them, the end of the world - apocalypse. They didn't have to wait for 2012.

Maybe I've been watching too many apocalyptic movies and reading too many books about the end of the world. I do teach a course on Mayan Hieroglyphs, the Calendar and 2012 and although I teach from a more academically oriented perspective than the 'stuff' I've been watching and reading, I do feel I should at least look into what others are saying, since it is bound to come up in class and I need to be abreast of what's out there in the popular culture, and.... I can't help having my own opinion about it all (which I do not impose on my students).

I couldn't help thinking as I heard what was coming down in Haiti as many forces hurriedly gathered to send in aid, rescue people and deal with all the trauma, that.... what if there were another one, just as bad, in a just as poverty-stricken a place as Haiti.. within a day or two...would there be enough of anything to handle it?

I believe that we will be soon seeing so many disasters happening simultaneously all over the world, that we won't be able to put out all the fires.

Haiti is the canary in the mine-shaft friends.
Haiti with its deforested, degraded environment, its lack of infrastructure and over-population is the face of most of the world outside of the affluent European/American world. Most countries have shanty towns extending miles out from the urban centers.

This is the fate that awaits the world. Haiti is doing her dance of death to show us what the world will come to if we do not control population, decrease our consumption of manufactured goods and greatly simplify our lives. We need to grow more of our own food, learn to make at least some of the things we use and reconnect with the natural world.

While you may feel sorry for the Haitians, and who wouldn't? I must say that they were in many ways better equipped to deal with that tragedy than we would be. One commentary I heard on the radio said that since the people of Haiti already live at the near starvation level, their bodies were more accustomed to deal without food than ours. Since they 'fasted' (starved) regularly, they were able to go without food for days as they were buried in the rubble. The average American obese teenager, would have a fit after a couple of hours without the greasy snacks and sugary sodas they pump in continuously throughout the day. My travels have shown me that poor people know how to cope better than we do. They have fewer, if any expectations. They know how to just 'be' and can go for hours without doing anything but just sitting. They don't have a constant need for entertainment or distraction.
I have a habit of looking at what people eat. The fattest people always have loads of junk in their shopping carts. It's amazing! I think to myself, 'don't they know any better?' The only thing I can figure is that they are addicts. Just like an addict, they might know better, but another voice whispers: "it's okay... you deserve this... go ahead."

Another issue is that there is just so much that can be done. Haiti has one disaster after another. Their government has been corrupt for decades. Their limited resources have either been exploited by others or have been used up. They don't have anything anyone wants (except cheap labor). Another thing is that say 'someone' fixes it all up... the next hurricane could take it all down again in no time. They are kind of living on a time bomb. Bad location folks.
In a radio interview someone said: "We need 100,000 tents. Are there that many tents in the whole world?" Good question.

As to the role the U.S. has played in the poverty of Haiti, I would like to say this... anyone who thinks we can have the standard of living we have here in America without someone paying the price, is totally naive. Corporate capitalism must have slaves/serfs/low-wage workers in huge quantities to do all the dirty work. Most Americans who call themselves free are really wage slaves making money for a corporation. One month without an income would put them in trouble (as we are now seeing). Most of your so-called possessions are on loan. When you can't pay the bill, the company takes it back. Anyone who has a mortgage does not own a home. The mortgage holder owns the home until it is paid off and... can be reclaimed anytime. DUH! Why are people so surprised by this? Credit card debt makes the average person a slave to the job so they can pay their bills.

When I had 'the best' job I ever had, I wondered why I never had any money despite my good income. When I figured out how much I spent on the clothes I needed for the job, the cost of meals eaten away from home, the parking fees or parking ticket fees, the cost of gas to commute to that great job, I realized I wasn't even 'making' minimum wage. I was working to pay for the job. Not to mention the 'goodies' I bought myself because I was so stressed out due to commuting, and working under a mean-spirited supervisor. I began to develop physical symptoms and after many tests, my doctor said it was all stress related and I would have to quit my job. I knew I was already too far in credit card debt to do that... besides, this wasn't just a job it was a career! No matter that my hair was falling out, I had dizzy spells and headaches, I had to stay. The doctor prescribed Valium. He said, "Drive to work then take one. Take another at lunch and by the time you are ready to do the commute home, it will have worn off enough so you can drive." HUH? Excuse me... now I have to take drugs so I can stay at a job I hate? I was really in a quandary as to what to do.

One day, life intervened, and my whole life changed in an hour. My family called to say my father found out he had six months to live, so I left the job and moved back home to be with him.

Within a couple of months, I was no longer able to keep up on the credit card bills. I didn't have much total debt, but when you have no income, any debt is too much. When I finally got the whole thing straightened out, I vowed never to have cards again. I went from having a secure government job to no income for a year. True, I left voluntarily, but, at the time, I felt it was the only option. I had to be with my dad in his last days. There was no other choice for me.

The average American is tens of thousands of dollars in debt. Many of these debts are incurred because they are miserable and need to buy themselves stuff to make it through the night or the weekend... or worse yet, their life. Then when someone pulls the plug by laying them off, or moving the job to a place where the labor is cheaper, they are stuck with all the debt and the stuff. NOT FAIR!!!!

Rather than see it as an opportunity to do things totally differently, they do everything they can to restore what they had.

My advice to Haiti and the Haitian people....
Soon, outside corporations will be brought in to rebuild the country in their own image. Burger King, the Golden arches, all the junk food outlets will come in. The people of Haiti would be better off to go back to the old days of agricultural villages, build simple houses out of renewable materials, plant their own food, raise animals to eat and pull wagons. Forget the 'bright lights of town', their only promise is empty and meaningless. Don't you know that most Americans take anti-depressants because they are so alienated from each other and the natural world? Take this golden opportunity to 'go back to the land' rather than to let ANY outsiders, or even their own government officials, force them into 'restoring' what was in the city. LET IT GO! Be the harbingers of a new day! You just had a major Pluto transit... don't waste it. Those who survived the Apocalypse should not try to go back to 'business as usual.'

This is a chance to create a sustainable future. If you do, Haiti, you will become the teacher for us when we fall into decline, which could happen any day. Rather than being beholden to 'developed' countries for aid, you will lead the way in showing us how to live. You will be the experts. Grow medicinal plants that can only thrive in your particular environment. Make your own medicine. Don't wait for anyone to put a band aid on your life. You will always be beholden to outsiders. Don't let the Zombies, the walking dead from the developed world, take over. Revive your indigenous soul!

Good Advice from Janis Joplin

2010-01-03T15:07:00.000-08:00

I don't know about you, but 2009 was one of the hardest years of my life. And yet, I learned many valuable lessons.

I broke my ankle and was out of commission for almost 3 months, unable to earn any money, drive, walk. It really taught me a lot about what the disabled endure every day of their lives for their entire lives. Just a few examples:

1) People treat you like you are stupid just because your legs don't work.
2) There are not enough disabled parking spots at popular venues - like grocery stores - Duh!
3) It is hard for others to know when you really could use some help and when it's unnecessary.
4) It brings out your creativity and resourcefulness.
5) You gotta have a sense of humor or you are finished.

A few lessons for the year...

Everyone should know the following things:

1) How to shop.
2) How to cook from scratch.
3) How to eat right.

If you know how to compare prices, remember which stores have the best buys on items you use a lot, and stock up when there are sales on items you regularly use, you can save a lot of money. Buy family packs of chicken and meat, then repackage into small bags and freeze.

Cooking does not take as much time as you think. You can prepare large amounts, divide it up and freeze meal-sized portions. You can do a lot with a crock pot, although I never leave one on when I'm not home, because I fear fire.

Maintaining your health by eating right can save you from getting sick.

Pawn shops can help you with short-term loans. Don't get more than you think you will be able to pay back, even if you feel the item is worth a lot more, unless you don't care about losing the item. There are finance charges, but if you fail to pay and lose the item, it does not affect your credit record and haunt you the rest of your life, because they have your collateral and the deal is over. You pawn your diamond ring, you can't pay them to get it back. They keep it. End of story.

Live in present time as much as possible. In every moment, find any small thing to be grateful for. A full belly, a hot bath, a bed, a roof, your T.V., your dog... whatever. Things could be worse. I guarantee the more you can do this, the better off you will be. Worrying about things you cannot change right now, is dangerous to your health.

Try to negotiate with those you owe money to. The worst they can do is say NO. They might say YES, but if you don't approach, they will not offer.

You can make a few bucks bringing your cans and bottles to a recycling station. If you don't need the money, give it to the attendant. I know they can use it.

Be as generous as you can even if you have very little. There is always someone worse off than you and generosity gets energy moving. I know this to be true. The more you give, the more the Universe gives you.

Allow yourself a treat once in awhile. "Splurge" and rent a movie or buy some food item you really love, but "can't afford". I'm talking $5.00 items here, not a new Mercedes. This will lift your spirits, which, again, is a way to bring in the light energy.

Now, of course, none of this applies if you are flush and having no financial challenges at all. But....who knows, lately even millionaires are going bankrupt and you could find yourself needing this advice after all.

Recently I was talking to the guy who runs the recycling station in town. I asked him how was his Christmas. He said, "I did without." He said he'd better shut up because he had to be careful what he said to people because they complained about his attitude and he could lose his job. This did not surprise me. Having worked as a 'public servant' most of my life, I knew that people treat you like shit and expect you to keep smiling. When you defend yourself, they report you. I took a lot of abuse from the public when I was a letter carrier. There were many nice people too, but the majority treated me like I was "less than", inferior and stupid.

I mentioned this to the guy hoping to convey some empathy about his situation.

I also said "Look, if the shit continues to hit the fan, or it gets worse, those same people are going to be coming to you for advice. Remember, you are the expert. You know how to live on nothing, how to survive the cold, sleep in your car, stay alive. They have lived their pampered entitled lives for so long, they don't have a clue how to keep warm without the heater on. And...since their self-esteem and self image are so tied up with their material possessions, if/when they lose it, they are going to go nuts. They're gonna need our help."

We had a good laugh over that one.

So, to summarize...in the words from a Janis Joplin song: "Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose." For those of you who have nothing or feel you are on the road to having nothing, think of it this way - the less you will have to lose later. And... the more you will value what you do have, which is the real message. You will then be on the road to true freedom.

And remember, nothing lasts forever. You may have already noticed that in regards to
'good' things, well, it's true of the 'bad' things too. The tide always turns. Learn to endure. Learning to be patient can serve you in ways you cannot even imagine. Start when you are standing in line. Do not distract yourself with your cell-phone. In fact, throw your cell phone away, right now. It is an enemy to your peace of mind, yes... really. Studies are showing that the latest addiction is to cell phones and texting. Anyway, back to the line. Just be there. Observe where you are, who is in line. Take it all in. As soon as you begin to truly be where you are.... believe me, you won't be there anymore. It's almost a law of nature. The line will move so fast, you'll have to adjust to that. Ha ha!

I feel this is going to be a good year. I have no real basis for this belief, just faith and trust, two of the gifts this year gave me.

The Road - Another Film About the End of Life as We Know It - Whoopee!

2009-12-07T15:28:00.000-08:00

Went to see the film "The Road." The poster said it is the most hopeful, optimistic film I would see this year. Perhaps it is meant to force us to be grateful for what we have now....but instead it portrays just how frail our security is.

I sure hope not. If you are depressed, don't see this film. While it may help you appreciate what you DO have, it is so graphic in its portrayal of the end of life as we have known it, it could make things worse for you. It feels real. And, somehow, possible. A look at what could happen?

It begins with an indication of fires and earthquakes that destroy nearly everything. You never find out what happened. A few people have somehow prepared in advance so they have some food and other resources stockpiled against this type of event, so they have survived, but clearly, not for long.

Bands of cannibalistic gangs (all men) range the countryside, raping, killing and eating everyone they find. They bear a strong resemblance to rednecks. There are many scenes of butchered, dismembered bodies and people being kept prisoner for future eating. Almost made me puke.

A father and his son wander the landscape searching for something to eat. All animals and plants have perished. They have been instructed to "go South" to the sea, but you never know why, even at the end.

It was so intense, so visceral. Now that it is so cold here in my house in the woods, I feel like I'm in the film.

I don't know what the point of the film is or how anyone could say it was hopeful or optimistic. It should be played after "2012" showing what happened to the few who survived.

Believe it or not, I am better than I was......

2009-10-30T15:17:00.000-07:00

I am back. This has been one of the most difficult years of my life.

I am in a financial crisis, which is not new for me, but this time, I have no job, no boyfriend or family to back me up if things get dire. And they are dire now. I could not do my craft shows for several months due to my broken ankle and now that I am doing them again, everyone is broke, so they are not buying. I had an investment that went bankrupt, so the last of my money is gone.

My cat, Grace, died. She had been ill for months with a thyroid and heart condition, taking meds twice a day. But she took a turn for the worse and was not going to get better.

Many friends have died or are critically ill.

I was housebound with a broken ankle for nearly 3 months, relying on friends for food, water and many chores around the house. I see that I can no longer live out here in the woods alone. It is life threatening. I watched a movie that really hit home last night called Grey Gardens. It is about a mother and daughter who were related to Jackie Kennedy. Based on a true story, it shows their descent from high society to penury. A house once filled with music, cocktails and guests, becomes a stinking repository of garbage and animals urinating everywhere. Very sad and depressing. I looked around my place here and saw that things are definitely deteriorating and I do not have the resources to maintain the house or the yard. I am considering moving into senior housing and selling the house for whatever I can get for it.

My lover/friend of twenty years just dropped out of my life with no explanation. He is out of the country right now and I cannot afford to call him. Also, I could not bear it if he did not take my call, so I am not going to do it.

I am depressed, heart-broken, cold, and feel that life has no meaning or purpose. We are just here to suffer, period.

What makes it harder in many ways is that I am surrounded by all these people who 'are praying for me' or 'sending me light' or encouraging me to 'change my attitude'. It drives me crazy.

Here I am in a freezing house (I cannot afford more propane, so I'm saving it to cook with), recycling my toilet paper for God's sake, and cooking beans every other day.... I know, at least I have a house, water, beans, a stove. And I get 'change your attitude' from people who have never suffered one minute of their lives. They have always lived in comfort.

I know we need rain, but a couple of weeks ago, during that storm, I had a collision with a downed tree and my insurance company is saying it was my fault and so raising my insurance. Hitting the tree was the safest option considering the road I was on. It took taking it in twice to get the repairs right and although most of it was covered by insurance, I still had to come up with a deductible. Thanks to a kind friend who had just given me a financial gift that I was planning to use for food, I had enough to make the deductible. So, I got my car fixed, but I don't have the money to put gas in it so I can use it. Maybe I should move into the car.

Oh yes, and the guaranteed roof job I had done a couple of years ago, continued to leak over my bed. I don't like it when it rains. I am totally dreading this winter, because I could not pay my flood insurance and I think we are due for a flood out here. I live 3 feet from a creek that goes over every few years.

I can just hear you now saying...."Don't be negative, change your attitude. Think positive." Do you really think that makes any difference? Do you really believe in "The Law of Attraction?" What if you want something good and your neighbor who hates you wants a tree to fall on your house? Whose LOA wins? Is it only good stuff that happens? If so, then you can think all the negative stuff you want.

I'd really like to hear from those who 'know' this is true. I'd like to hear what you have to say about it. So.... now that I am thinking negatively, do I have to feel bad about that too? I feel what I feel. I try to do what I can each moment to feel better. Sometimes that means 'stopping thought'. I am beginning to see 'losing your mind' as a good thing. Who wants to remember anything? Forget it all. Just breathe in and breathe out. No thoughts. Bliss. Forget the unpayable bills. Be Here Now. Maybe the whole thing is just a dream. We will all wake up to a happy life.

Tears, Tea, and Tomatoes

2009-09-15T12:12:00.000-07:00

I have not been posting for awhile for a number of reasons. One being that I have been in a funk. My cat, Grace, took a downturn and had to be 'put to sleep' a couple of weeks ago. I have been so sad and missing her so much that it has been paralyzing.

The state of the world and my personal life have led me to believe that life is meaningless and that everything I have been doing is worthless. Knowing at a deeper level that these thoughts are a trick and that I must not succumb to them, I have been spending more time with friends and going to Master Gardener activities, which are interesting, connected to nature and free.

I can now say this strategy has worked to move me out of depression and renewed my sense of purpose.

Spent a delightful afternoon at a Master Gardener book club meeting and tomato tasting. So many varieties, colors and flavors. We also sampled dishes made with tomatoes including green tomato pickles, tomato jelly and tomato chutney.

The book everyone was reading was East Wind Melts the Ice by Liza Dalby and she came and did a talk about the book and some of her experiences in Japan. In Japanese culture, the year is divided into 72 seasons that last 5 days each. The book goes through the year and each of the seasons. A very different way of looking a the cycles of nature.

I was intrigued by her because she is a cultural anthropologist who writes both non-fiction and fiction and has credibility in both genres.

Many years ago when I wanted to become a writer, I went back to school in a doctoral program thinking that would 'force' me to write. Well, yes it did, but not in the way I wanted. There is a huge difference between scholarly writing and writing for the public. In her case, after she finished her doctorate and was teaching at the University of Chicago, she realized she also wanted to write fiction. She and I discussed the differences between the styles of writing and the audience.

I was inspired after talking with her to get back to my novel. It is so good to meet someone who is successful at what you want to do - being a writer with an anthropological perspective. She lives nearby and I hope to develop a friendship with her.

Liza studied to be a geisha and did her anthropological fieldwork in Japan. Her website

Just a couple of days before, I had gone to a viewing of The Meaning of Tea, by Scott Chamberlin Hoyt at Traditional Medicinals in Sebastopol. Japan was one of the countries featured in the movie. Others were Morocco, England, France, Taiwan and India.

Four of the people I went to Morocco with were at the film showing. Robin, Shelley, Dorothy, Huck and I went on the Plant Lovers Tour of Morocco in 2007 with Rosemary Gladstar. A memorable trip where we drank a lot of tea.

Finding and Following Your Star - Julie & Julia

2009-08-19T13:22:00.000-07:00

Last night, we had a Ladies' Night out. Dinner at a Vietnamese restaurant then off the see Julie & Julia. Five of the six of us had worked together at the Forestville Post Office as Rural Carriers. Two still work at a post office, two are retired, and they put me out to pasture after I got hit by a truck, hurt my shoulder and could no longer deliver mail.

Even though I worked overtime nearly every week, substituted on all the routes, could do all types of mail processing, etc., my classification was "part time" so I had no recourse.

I miss the income, but I do not miss the job. The best part of it I still have - the friends I made - 'comrades in arms.' We share our 'war stories' and our present lives. We all live within a few miles of each other. One woman even lives on my street.

The other part of the job I liked was the dogs. I always carried treats and threw them to the dogs, who waited, with their tails wagging, inside the fences. If the dogs were in the house, they started barking when I came by, fearing they would miss their treat. I left the treats in the mailbox.

We went to see Julie & Julia. A fantastic film. I loved it, for so many reasons. One was Meryl Streep. One of my favorite actors: that woman can play anyone. It's like she channels the person. Truly amazing. The other thing I loved was the walk down memory lane - the 50s and early 60s - my childhood days. Seeing the clothes, cars, furniture etc. was so nostalgic. I envied the marriages these two women had. I have never had a relationship like that in my life. Supportive, smart, employed, gentle, sexy - where did they meet these men? I cried with envy, knowing what a difference it can make to have a partner like that, even though I have never had one.

I realized how much I love to oook and have dinner parties. Yes, when I first moved into my tiny house, I had small dinner parties. I have a large collection of cookbooks and when I travel, I always buy herbs and spices not available here at home. I miss cooking for people.

Julie and Julia, two women who made their mark following their heart's desire. I could see how much difference having a goal that serves as a guiding star, can make in your life.

Right now, I feel lost at sea, anchorless, floundering, adrift. It feels like so many things I have set my hand to have failed. I am truly tired of trying to find something that works. I feel surrounded by loss and endings. I understand now why people are so thrilled when a baby is born. Something new, hope, a new start.

Oh! to have something to look forward too! I find myself whiling away the time playing computer games, accomplishing nothing besides keeping my meat suit alive.

This movie made me laugh and cry. I never watched Julia Child on T.V. I only knew her as the brunt of jokes and slapstick gags. Now I see what a delightful person she was. Truly charming. A magical being. A woman who was herself and by so doing freed others to be themselves. I wish I were more like her. She had a big heart, a warm smile and an infectious laugh. At least, that is how Streep portrayed her and Streep, being who she is, would do all she could to be faithful to the truth of the character.

Long live Julia Child!

Hooked on Farmville

2009-08-08T09:46:00.000-07:00

Just what I needed - another addiction. I have just discovered Facebook and one of its games called Farmville. I can't believe that I get up at 6:30 in the morning to plant strawberries so that I can harvest them by 10:30.

Meanwhile my real garden outside is neglected and dry. We are truly moving into a virtual reality.

I am finally able to walk and drive and in two months, the world has moved on and left me behind. I feel like an alien when I do venture forth. I actually prefer to stay home alone.

I find myself unwilling and unable to interact with people in the real world. I only want to live in the virtual world of the Internet. I read posts by others and everyone seems so positive, so up, so full of energy. Am I the only one who feels about to fall into a deep dark hole?

I love to sleep, but each night it alludes me. I have to fight off thoughts of disaster. I am broke, have lost my medical insurance and have 50 bucks to my name. No job, too old to get one and still recovering from a broken ankle. Then, of course, there is the issue of no job to be had.

I am scared. I admit it. I can't keep pretending everything is okay. It's not. When I stay focused on the present moment, I am okay although constantly in pain. Physical pain seems easier to bear than mental and emotional pain.

The only pleasure I have is playing Farmville. Pathetic. But I guess those people who design these things, know how bad off people are these days. The illusion of connection to people and Nature is more satisfying than reality.

Cousin Frank Does it Again!

2009-07-01T10:34:00.000-07:00

Yes, he's still running. This time in Seattle for the Rock and Roll Marathon this past weekend.

Here I am on my butt with a broken ankle, can't walk, can't drive and he's up there running for .... how many miles? Boggles the mind. I am going to be happy to walk again.

He started out in San Francisco last year, I think to see if he could do it and got hooked on running. Now it's a regular part of his life.
He looks great, don't you think? Well, he always did. Handsome guy and great dancer! In high school when we wanted to go somewhere that needed a 'date', we would go together. We used to belong to a square dance club because we both liked to dance so much. And we always went roller-skating together. It was cool then (yes, it was a long time ago.)

X number of years ago, he and I took a car trip to Vancouver and brought my dog Gypsy. We camped out and cooked outside on a fire (well, we tried to.) We took the ferry to Victoria Island and hitch-hiked into town. Two elderly ladies picked us up and were so excited to meet us. They insisted that we come to their house for tea. And it was the ultimate English tea experience. Outside in their lovely garden with scones and all. Then they took us into town. They worried we would get stranded and invited us to return and stay if we did.

On the route up north, we stopped in Seattle and visited our cousin Elsie and her husband Paul.

It was a free-wheeling trip by two 20 somethings. We had a great time.

Hey Frank, wanna go to Morocco with me? How about next year?

Plug and Play? In Whose Universe?

2009-06-19T12:08:00.000-07:00

My Mayan Hieroglyph Class started last night at the local Junior College. When I first proposed the class the staff at the Community Education office suggested I wait until the Fall, because Summer enrollment is not good and I might be disappointed. The minimum was set at 12 and I got 24, so I am happy about that. One staff member told me many classes were cancelled.

The so-called 'plug and play' computer system was a joke. We just could not connect my laptop to the overhead projector and finally had to use the files on my thumb drive on their system. Unfortunately, the software they had was older than mine and did not support various elements of the newest Power Point and so about 25% of my presentation was either lost or non-functional. I have been working on this for 6 months, so you know how disappointed I was. I couldn't believe that a classroom in the Computer Science Building on campus would have old software and shoddy equipment. Welcome to the budget crunch. I looked longingly at the old-fashioned overhead projector I had requested, wishing I had brought those old transparencies I had made years ago for this class. They would have worked! Next time....

I think the class was successful since the students voted for no break and I had to tell them to leave 10 minutes after the class was to have ended. They were really into it. So glad. I have students who seem to be in their teens (they are probably 30 - but they look young to me LOL) and others maybe in their 80s. A real cross section.

I am still on crutches so I had to teach from a wheelchair. Who said they have made things accessible? It was damn hard to teach a class from a chair, because you can only reach up a foot or so on the blackboard and you have to sit at a strange angle since the chair is in the way. Heaven forbid you have too much pain to twist around like that! There are plenty of special seats and tables for the students, but.... what about disabled instructors?

I have learned a lot about what the disabled have to go through and from now on, I will never take my body for granted. When my two feet both hit the ground together again, I am going to celebrate. I have one week to go, but I'm not sure I'll be able to walk again right away. My foot looks like dead fish and it might take a little physical therapy to wake it up again.

Am I ranting? Sounds like it. But I was so upset by the end of class I couldn't relax for a couple hours afterwards. I am a bit of a perfectionist and control freak (no one who has ever seen the inside of my house would think that, but just ask my friend Steve.) I want everything to run smoothly when I'm teaching a class and if it doesn't, it feels like a nightmare. For me, last night was a nightmare. But the fact that they didn't want a break and had to be told to go home, says a lot about what the students thought.

Someone asked me if they could get a CD of the class. Well, that was my original plan. To make them all CDs as part of their materials package, but when I really got into doing the slide show, and saw that I was going to have 200+ slides, I decided not to do it. But, wouldn't you know it, like a drunk on a binge, my ego blurted out. I told them that had been the plan. NOW WHAT? Does that mean I have to do it? I could just give them an edited version. I could sell them one. Although the school said I couldn't, instructors in this program are always peddling their books and CDs. Today I can't think about it, but we will see.

The Value of Friends

2009-05-25T16:58:00.000-07:00

As you have probably figured out by now, I have not been very actively blogging for awhile. One thing and another. Getting ready to teach a class on Mayan Hieroglyphs at Santa Rosa Junior College this summer is one thing that is taking a lot of time.

My new blog on 2012 and reading everything I can on 2012 is taking a lot of time too.

Then I broke my right ankle and cannot walk or drive for a couple of months. I find myself tired just trying to take care of the basics. If not for my friends, I wouldn't even have any food. Someone comes over every couple of days to help me around the house and bring food.

But today, I looked at my BlogCatalog account and found that I had gotten an award from one of my friends in Turkey! That made me really feel good. Thank you Aprill!
Her blog: ShiningDay http://sunshine.blogsever.com/

I haven't yet written about my trip to Turkey in 2005, but it was wonderful. When the economy recovers (if it ever does), I want to go back. I have friends there that I can stay with - in Izmir.

So now it's my turn to pass on the award. Drum roll please.....
The winners are:

Seanymph at Mermaids Treasures http://mermaidstreasures.blogspot.com/
Jackie at Herbs 'n Oils http://herbs-n-oils.blogspot.com/
BetterSpines http://betterspines.com
My gypsygoods http://mygypsygoods.blogspot.com/
EJ Cooksey Halloween For Kids http://halloweenforkids.blogspot.com/
Daisy the Curly Cat http://daisythecurlycat.blogspot.com/
Maitri's Heart... Living in The Moment with Loving-Kindness, Compassion, and Grace...
http://www.magicandmomentsatdragonflycottage.com

If you want to pass it on, here are the 'rules'

1. Put the logo on your blog
2. Add a link to the person who awarded you
3. Nominate at least 7 other blogs
4. Add links to those blogs on yours
5. Leave a message for your nominees on their blog

Can Do No More - At Least For Awhile

2009-05-04T12:27:00.000-07:00

Well I guess it's back to blogging for awhile. I had gotten so busy with 'my life' lately, that I have not had much time for blogging, but all that changed Friday. I was in Calistoga at a Plant Spirit Healing training, when I slipped and fell and broke my right ankle.

Won't be able to drive for at least a month and have to go around on crutches. Barely was able to get up the brick walk way to my house and had to go up the steps on my butt. Now that I am inside, where I live like a pack rat, it's a real obstacle course. I was planning to begin a major spring cleaning this week. Oh well.

It's survival mode. I live alone so there is no one to help me. I open cans of soup, put them in the microwave, then have to stand there to eat them because I don't have any place to sit down in my tiny kitchen and I can't carry soup and hobble on crutches at the same time.

I am really learning how hard it is for people who live like this all the time. As the nurse in the ER said, "this is only temporary lady. You will recover." Yes and at the same time it is really hard not to fall into self-pity. He was not sympathetic at all.

I have not paid my health insurance premium in three months because money has been so tight and I had to pay property taxes recently. Before I let the ambulance take me in I tried to talk to the hospital (no names) to see if I am still covered and they gave me the run around. "Yes, you are still covered, but you must pay now or your coverage will go back to March." Huh? I was nearly hysterical with pain and she actually repeated the same words three times as I tried to get a clear answer. I know they must treat you in the ER, but I can't pay a huge bill if it comes.

I am a total wuss when it comes to pain. I already feel quite burdened psychologically by the suffering of the world. Most people I know are very depressed these days and so am I. This is one more thing I have to deal with.

But today, stuck in bed, raining outside, freezing inside, I got back to my blogs and realize I have all the time in the world to play around with the computer, because there is nothing else I CAN DO at this time. It is a great way to spend time. So you will be hearing from me more often.

Sometimes You Just Have to Jump Ship Before It Sinks!

2009-04-08T12:51:00.000-07:00

One more thing. Due to the economic crisis, Sonoma County is trying to cut back. There will be a series of meetings to get feedback about areas where there could be reductions or complete cuts. Apparently, whether to get rid of the Master Gardener Program in this county or not is being discussed. While it is an off shoot of the University of California Cooperative Extension, each county in the State has to contribute to the financial support of the program locally.

I have been in the program for three years now. I feel that we could be of much more value to the community than we are, but we are constrained by the rules of the program itself. A few years ago, I wanted to do library presentations on the 'crops of the Americas' motivated by a new stamp put out by the Postal Service. The talk would have been about the significance of five plants domesticated in the New World and was to include recipes and foods to sample (prepared by me). I was told I could say nothing about recipes, let alone let people sample. We could not advise how to use anything. A talk about herbs was strictly about growing them, not what they were for - you could say rosemary is often used as a culinary herb, but no more. Well, this totally turned me off and I decided not to proceed at all.

Lately, during the book club meeting where we discussed "The End of Food" (see below), some of us expressed the frustration we feel that while we have been specially trained to provide information to the public, there are so many constraints that we are in fact, ineffectual. Many of us agreed that we must be proactive is assisting the public in growing their own food and making healthier food choices. Many people don't eat fresh vegetables because they have no idea how to prepare them. There was talk of forming our own group outside of the official one that would get more hands-on.

If the MG program is disbanded in this county, I guess that might free us up to do what we want. Of course, we will not have the benefit of all the support we get from the program, nor the access we have to the public via the county fair, farmers' markets, and other events where we volunteer.

So Now it's the End of Food Too?

2009-03-16T17:45:00.000-07:00

I took time away from reading the 2012 books to read one for my Master Gardener reading group. The End of Food is one of those books that will change your way of thinking. And yes, it's a bit depressing. But if you're paying attention at all, you know. Paul Roberts, the author, knows what he's writing about. A must-read for anyone interested in sustainability, food safety, globalism and the power of multi-national corporations.

One thing I learned that was very interesting and useful is that our bodies are designed to live through periods of feast and famine. For most of the time that humans have lived on this planet, we have not had food available all the time. There could be months when there was barely enough to keep us alive. So our bodies adapted to that condition and have not yet adapted to food being around 24/7 (at least in the 'developed' world). When we had plenty, we ate. Whatever fat we put on we were going to need for the famine period.

Our bodies are designed to store and hold on to fat, even if the fat is in excess, because the expectation is that we will use it up. Unfortunately (?) we never have a famine period (most of us). This is one reason why obesity is on the rise. Only a few years ago, an obese person was rare. Now, they are the rule, not the exception. You look around and almost everyone is over-weight to some degree. As many people are obese in the world as are starving. Both are problems. Roberts says there is no way to lose weight just by changing the diet. You must get more exercise. Your life must get much more active. In this culture of push buttons, remotes, cars, and instant gratification, that is not going to happen.

The focus of the book is primarily on the commodification of food. Food as thing. Food as source of income. How multi-national corporations control both the supply and the demand. How they pay for the best display areas in supermarkets, force other smaller companies out by making more and more products, and always seek the cheapest ingredients, no matter what the quality.

The other major revelation came in regards to E.coli and salmonella. Apparently these are considered 'natural' and uncontrollable in the food supply. Thus the consumer is expected to provide the 'kill step' that is, cooking, in order to control it. It is not feasible for the corporations who provide the food to the store to do this. So..... does that mean that if you get sick or die because of these bacterial pathogens, it's your own fault? Because you ate it? Or didn't cook it long enough? According to this book, there is salmonella in most meat you get at the store. Is this a case of 'let the buyer beware'? I know that the FDA is way under-staffed and that these days we import food from all over the world, but hey! wait a minute! It makes me not want to buy anything from the supermarket again.

Roberts says that the whole system is at risk of total collapse. Growers are maxing out, fertilizers and pesticides are maxing out. Transportation costs, marketing, advertising, the whole system as it exists is ready to fall apart. It is completely unsustainable and any and all changes in weather, economics, politics, energy etc. make its demise imminent. He does mention that farmers' markets, locally grown and distributed food are very important, but cannot be relied on to serve the majority of people. Over-population and high levels of energy consumption contribute the most to the problems.

The most inspiring part of the book was, for me, that last couple of pages. He says that another thing we can do, no matter where the ingredients come from, it to take back control over this part of our lives by preparing our own meals and eating them with other people.

"Food has, for better or for worse, served for millennia as a sort of umbilical link between us and the physical, natural realm. By diminishing this link between consumption and production, we have allowed ourselves to drift away from the real world, and to understand less, and to care less about its functions and condition."

As an anthropologist and a person who grew up in a bi-cultural home, I can attest to the significance of food to culture. Ask anyone from a traditional culture the importance food has and they will probably look at you like you're nuts. Even at the heart of Catholicism, there is a meal. The Mass is a celebration of the Last Supper where one eats and drinks of the body of Christ. Even the U.S. holidays, which are not that holy anymore, are centered around food. What would you eat on Thanksgiving if not turkey? (I once had a nut-based turkey substitute at a friend's house and I can tell you, it was not the same).

If you have ever lived or travelled for long in another country, you know that what you miss most is your favorite food. I used to dream about food and shopping at Safeway when I was in the Peace Corps in Zaire. I was not starving, but they just didn't have food I was used to. I remember to this day, returning to the States and going to a restaurant and having a piece of cheesecake. I can still see and taste it to this day and that was over 30 years ago. I really enjoyed it.

I highly recommend the book. Informative but not much fun. Provides incentive to start growing your own food whenever possible and buying from small local farmers even if it is more expensive.

The Kite-Runner - Great Movie

2009-03-05T13:14:00.000-08:00

As you know, I don't have T.V. here where I live, so my major entertainment from the outside world is the radio (limited reception) and Netflix. I tend to see films later than most people, but I have a huge selection to choose from.

Recently I saw "The Kite Runner", an incredibly sensitive film about Afghan-Americans and the history of Afghanistan for the last 30 years or so. The film is realistic and informative, showing just a little about how much life has changed in Afghanistan in the past 30 years. It's enough to reveal how little we know about the how the current fundamentalism in Muslim countries is both radical and unwelcome by most of those whom it affects. Most countries where the faith is primarily Islam, have been modernizing just as all other countries. The radical fundamentalism that has been rising up is reactionary and militant.

This morning on the radio, someone finally said that we have been under the control of a coup in this country for the past 8 years. If we did not have a strong tradition of 'democracy' and an established term limit for 'rulers', we would still be under the control of that coup. In a sense, we are. They have run off with our money, ruined our economy and our reputation in the world and they are all somewhere now having a ball with our retirement funds while we are hanging on by our fingernails.

We were almost taken over by fundamentalists too. 'Christian' ones. To my understanding, Muslim fundamentalists are no more Muslim than Christian ones are Christian. Yes, I am saying that neither actually follows their prophet nor their book of revelation. Their agendas are private, political and economic. In a sense, they use so-called tradition to justify the most despicable practices of 'modernism'. As the film shows, the leaders of the fundamentalist movement in Afghanistan committed the most heinous crimes against children, while exacting draconian punishments from the public for far lesser crimes. Our recent fundamentalist regime tortured, killed and terrorized thousands, instilling fear in all of us. They violated the Constitution, committed crimes against humanity and got away with it all (so far). In other countries they have a harder time controlling tyrants and preventing them from taking over permanently.

This film tells the story of two boys who grow up together in Kabul before the Soviet invasion. While class separates them, as children they live as brothers. When the Soviets invade, the upper class child is able to escape to America, while the servant remains and suffers the fate of so many others.

The film shows how Afghan-Americans have created their own sub-culture in America, as have so

many other ethnic groups in this country. This was especially interesting to me, because they have a large community in one of the towns I lived in as a child. In fact, the majority of Afghan-Americans in this country live in or around that town. What a difference from when I lived there! It was somewhat 'red-neck' when I lived there. The Mexican-American farm-workers were barely tolerated, let alone Afghans! Good to know that things have changed since then.

For some reason, since I was a child, I have always wanted to go to Afghanistan. So far, I have not had the opportunity to go and the way things are looking, I may never be able to. But then, who knows.

There are scenes from all over the SF Bay Area. So it had a familiar feel to it. While it is always challenging to watch a film with subtitles, the fact that the movie uses the Afghan language makes it more realistic. I highly recommend this film to anyone who wants to understand more about what people are dealing with and want to expand their preconceptions.

What's Going On?

2009-02-15T12:14:00.000-08:00

I've noticed a trend. I look at hundreds of blogs on a regular basis and it seems that, in general, people are reporting that their lives have gotten so much more complex, busy or difficult that they have neglected their blogs. They either don't have a thing to say, or they don't have time to write.

What's going on? Is it a fad that is losing it's appeal? Are people finding out just how hard it is to make money blogging? Or has life taken a turn in the last couple of months? I think it's a little of all of those. Or is it something else?

I often get asked how you make money blogging. I make most of my money through Amazon. Sometimes I sell products through Etsy. I make the least from Adsense, but I do make some. True, I don't know much about all the ways to increase traffic. When I write regularly and drop my Entrecards regularly, my stats go up and that helps things a lot. While I started out blogging just to make money, I soon found that it was a medium for expressing myself and writing about the things I enjoy.

Lately, it has become a bit of a chore, sorry to say. I have been wondering why. And I can see from my perusal of other blogs, that others are experiencing the same thing. In fact, I am finding most things in life - a chore. I have this growing sense, that more and more aspects of life are losing their meaning. That so many of my activities are totally irrelevant. I see people bustling around and I wonder why?

The only thing I can find to account for these changes in my behavior and attitudes is the shift I experienced after hearing about the ideas of Nassim Haramein last month. You can go to his website, to see what he's doing. It's as if I feel the presence of another level of reality that is closer to REALITY and that this world is but an distant echo of it and is fading away. I know that sounds bizarre, but believe me, this is a sensation I have never experienced before and so it is difficult to describe. I feel hope and excitement about this approaching NEW WORLD or new level of reality. In some way, I feel it is already here, beginning to peek through.

I have changed many of my habits and activities. I have become activated in some odd way. I have created a new blog about 2012

I feel something has shifted in me as a result of hearing the information that Haramein expresses and a friend of mine says the same thing from watching his material on YouTube. I believe that, due to resonance, people are feeling the shift in consciousness and reacting to it and have no idea why. They use the explanations they know because they have no other way of communicating it. Haramein has plugged into the Shift that is occurring as a result of our conjunction to the Galactic Center and so his ideas are riding the wave of that Shift.

I'm curious about what changes you are experiencing, if any, and how you account for them.

I want to make it clear that the DVD being offered through the Amazon link in the sidebar is different from that advertised in the picture above. The one in the picture is a 4 DVD set for 84.00 and the one at Amazon is 1 DVD for 9.95. I just thought the graphic from Haramein's website was beautiful.

I'm Back.... Sort of

2009-01-26T17:15:00.000-08:00

Well, I'm sort of back. After two weeks, Circuit City called to tell me that since they will be going out of business soon, the service center sent my computer back unfixed and could I hurry up and pick it up before they shut for good. Great! Two weeks without my computer and still not fixed! I will have to send it in myself. Of course, I am concerned about all the people losing their jobs and the fact that one more company is folding during this meltdown.

To be able to use my computer, I had to buy a wireless mouse, because it was my mouse pad that went south. I practiced with it and it is okay for backup, but want my built-in mouse pad again.

Now try to tell me there's no such thing as "mercury retrograde". I knew something would go wrong with this process, but I took it in anyway. I will wait until past the "shadow period" before I dare send it in. This includes the degree that mercury went retrograde.

One thing I learned was just how "addicted" I am to being online everyday for hours. I miss my blog friends soooo much! I miss reading my favs and dropping my EC card. And, yes, I did clean house (a little). Did a major archaeological excavation of the downstairs storage area and almost every pile in the rest of the house. And threw stuff out! Yes, for those who know me, this is amazing! I am a pack rat. Born under the Chinese sign of Rat and boy if you ever come in my house, you'll know it. Now at least I know what is in the piles. When I have to send the computer in again in about a month, I will tackle some more of that.

I also have the goal of creating a space to see my astrology and flower essence clients starting in March or April. I have been thinking about this for months. Rent an office? Share a space with others? What? I have decided to create an area downstairs. That way I am not pressured to "make money" to pay the rent and I can create the atmosphere I want.

I also had to "dig" to find one box that contains all the materials for a class I hope to teach this summer at a local junior college on Mayan Hieroglyphs. I taught the class as a weekend workshop 5 years at Sonoma State University many years ago. I have continued to do my own research since then and want to teach it again at a place more people can afford. I am also producing a CD of the class which I will offer for sale here and on my other blogs which teaches basic hieroglyphs, the Mayan calendar, plus the latest info on 2012.

During this computerless period, I have been reading everything I can find on 2012 from many perspectives. You can see some of the books on my astrology blog.

Limited Internet for Two Weeks

2009-01-12T16:13:00.001-08:00

To all my readers, my computer is in the shop for two weeks and I don't know if I will be able to post during that time since I have to use the Internet in the county library and so I have a short time limit each day. See you all soon! I might actually be forced to clean house....

2009 - New Year - Fresh Start

2009-01-02T11:53:00.000-08:00

The concept of New Year's resolutions is that with the beginning of a new year, we have the opportunity to start anew - have a fresh start on our life.

Usually I don't make New Year's resolutions because I find that either I totally forget them within a few days or I find them irrelevant as I move through the year.

This year, however, I am making some. The reason is that I feel it is time to do those things I know I need for health and sanity. I believe we are now in a time when we need to be congruent with what we know to be true. For me this means I can no longer think one way and do another. I need to be unified within, stop self-sabotage and follow the truth I have discovered in my life. I am starting my 4th katun of life (after 60), and with Saturn passing through my first house, I have been acknowledging that I have become an elder, even though I did not have children of my own. I have had "an interesting life" and have done many things. I have learned a lot.

We must all be prepared to give our gifts to life, so that means taking care of ourselves so that we are emotionally fit. Caroline Casey says it's time to open our 'magic backpacks' and see what tools we have acquired that may be useful during these challenging times.

My resolutions are:

1. I will visit the ocean at least once a month. I only live 17 miles from the ocean, so it is easy to do it. The sea air and the rhythm of the waves are both purifying and rejuvenating.

2. I will meditate every day. I need to connect to the Source on a regular basis in a focused way.

3. I will sing with other people at least once a month. Creating sound with other people opens and connects the heart and throat chakras. Then, the energy created and released goes to the hands where it can be made manifest.

4. I will dance with other people at least once a month. This is vital to keep the body flexible and the lower chakras clear.

5. I will prepare my downstairs to receive clients. I am ready to claim my skills of intuition, divination and inspiration. I am an herbalist, energy healer and astrologer. To see some of this work go to my website, my herbal blog, and my astrology blog.

6. I will take my vitamins and supplements. I need to keep my physical body healthy.

7. I will walk at least twice a week. Exercise is good for body and mind. The rhythm of walking keeps me in synchrony with Nature.

I have been involved in a spiritual path for most of my life. Sometimes I have been involved in groups, sometimes not. Currently I am on the outer edge of several circles. Rather than going to this or that activity, I am striving to 'be' the teachings. This is the goal I believe.

There was a time and place to sit at the feet of teachers, but I feel with the passage of Pluto through Sagittarius, that time is over. We need to take responsibility for ourselves, stop being victims, find our inner authority (Pluto in Capricorn).

A Tribute to Thistle Farms

2008-12-13T17:03:00.000-08:00

Not sure where this post belongs - here or on Hamida the Herbalist. It actually bridges both blogs. While reading Victoria magazine January/February issue, I came upon a story about a business and project that is fantastic.

It's called Thistle Farms and it's a non-profit that assists women survivors of violence of all sorts, who learn to produce natural beauty products. This is similar to an idea I had many years ago while working at a women's shelter as a client advocate.

While the services we provided assisted women and children to get away from domestic violence, we were not able to help them much after they left. Many of them depended on the income from the violent partner. The "luckier" ones were on welfare before they came into the shelter. All they had to do was change their address. The ones with no means of support often felt forced to go back to the bad situation because someone was paying the bills. I always thought that we needed to provide or create programs where women could both acquire skills and earn a living while still being in a semi-protected situation.

Thistle Farms in conjunction with other organizations appears to have made my dream a reality. At least for women in Tennessee.

I would love to help create something like that here where I live. It should include a farm where the residents could grow the herbs used in the products and as much of their own food as possible. There would be so many benefits.

When I worked at the shelter, I found that many of the women did not know much about nutrition or cooking from scratch. They ate a lot of fast food or prepared food - both bad for them and their children in so many ways. But they just didn't know any different. These foods are not only useless nutritionally, but also expensive. I managed to bring in Nutritionists from the Agricultural Extension Office to teach food preparation and healthier eating habits. We also got free organic vegetables from a local farm. Half the time the women didn't have a clue about what things were or what to do with them. I don't blame them. Our modern lifestyle encourages media consumption at the expense of living full lives.

Jodhaa Akbar for Christmas

2008-12-09T11:35:00.001-08:00

Yes, I have put up another ad for the Christmas season. I have no problem promoting Amazon, because I totally support reading. I love movies too and you can buy them there as well. In fact, I just watched an incredible movie, one of the most beautiful films I have ever seen. I will buy a copy for sure.

It's from India and is in an Indian language with English or Arabic subtitles. It is 3 hours and 45 minutes yet I was sorry to see it end. Jodhaa Akbar is based on the lives of real people and takes place during an opulent period in Indian history.

The music, costumes, and sets are so incredible. It made me want to be young and in love for the first time. Of course, in their case, it helps that they were the richest people in the land as well.

Basically the Emperor Akbar, a Muslim, marries Jodhaa, a Hindu princess during a time when there was much war and strife around issues of land and religion. Yet, Akbar allows her to keep her own religion and culture while living in a Muslim palace. In fact, in time he rules that there will be total religious tolerance in his empire.

Perhaps India needs to go back to its own history (and so do we Americans) to remember these founding principles of tolerance and acceptance. They both respect each other and therefore expand themselves and learn new ways of being, without sacrificing their own traditions. Others try to force them to reject or limit, but they don't go along with that. Instead their love grows as they come to understand each other more. Inspiring.

Grateful for my childhood

2008-11-30T14:55:00.000-08:00

Hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving. Mine turned out much better than I expected. I knew the family I was visiting had a little girl, but I did not know about the boy. They were the most delightful, intelligent and well-mannered kids I have met in years. Victoria and Morgun (supposed to be Morgan, but dad was so worn out after the whole birth thing, he couldn't write straight when he filled out the paperwork). I guess the hospital staff didn't question it. Duh! I guess they are so used to misspelling or 'creative' spellings of names, they don't even notice anymore.

And they had two dachshunds that were the sweetest little things. I got my face washed more times than I care to count. Yes, I know their mouths are "clean", but that's hard to remember when you see where else they've been. Midway in the day they were lolling across my body on their backs gazing up at me in such an adorable way.

Earlier, as I was getting ready to go in the morning, I noticed a commotion out on the highway. Many cars and people. I thought perhaps the neighbor up the road was having a big dinner and people were parking along the highway. But no, it was another car off the road and in the ditch. They were trying to help before the CHP came. Funny, I hadn't heard this one go off. Usually there's a squealing of tires then some type of crash. I write a about this on Hamida the Herbalist, Issue of the Week for last week.

I guess no one was hurt as they did not call the police. It made me even more careful driving that day.

We had the usual Thanksgiving dishes, including pumpkin pie made from scratch.
Throughout the day I thought about Thanksgivings past. This has always been my favorite holiday, but not necessarily because of what happened. I just liked it, that's all.

Since my parents divorced when I was around 7 or so, and they both felt I should get the benefit of both of them, they decided that each year they would schedule the holidays in advance. One year Dad got me for Thanksgiving, Mom for Christmas - etc. The next year they would switch.

I always preferred Dad for Thanksgiving, since he married another "American" and they would have "real Thanksgiving". That is, turkey, dressing, yams, pumpkin pie. My mother's people would have "Italian Thanksgiving" which meant tons of food, but no turkey or dressing. Yams? No way. It was more like roast beef with lots of garlic and a mountain of spaghetti.

For Christmas, Mom was best since her family was so huge and I had so many cousins, it meant I got a ton of presents. If I was not going to be there, it seemed I got fewer presents. Also, we would spend ALL DAY eating! I mean it. We'd get to grandma's around noon (after Church) and stay at the table until 10pm or so. We usually had two meals plus desserts, nuts, fruit etc.

Between meals, the men would go out to smoke and play horseshoes, or stay in and play cards, while the women cleaned up the first set of dishes and argued. Us kids would go outside and try to get grandpa's bull the chase us out in the field, then hope to run back through the huge gate in time. What fun! Or we might try to play "baseball" out in the yard near the barn. You had to be careful not to end up in the cesspool, that was inconveniently situated in the yard. We mostly used the outhouse attached to the barn for a toilet, so the cesspool was not as bad as it might have been. We thought nothing of this. It had a structure consisting of mountains of lumber over the top. The only reason I ever knew there was a cesspool there at all was when something went wrong one time and my uncles had to uncover it and fix something - a pump I guess.

Even though I was an only child until my mother remarried and had another daughter, I was part of a huge extended Italian (Sicilian) family. We spent most of our lives visiting each other. There was always something. Holidays, birthdays, showers, weddings, baptisms, then later funerals. My grandparents never spoke English even though they were in this country for nearly 75 years. They had green cards.

I am so grateful I grew up like this. I feel so fortunate. It makes it very difficult to handle holidays now, however. It doesn't feel right unless there are at least 20 people at the table.

At Dad's American Thanksgiving, I had all the great traditional food. When my first step-mother was around, we usually went to her sister's house. They "had money" so they really did it up right. Even the booze they drank was expensive. They had a huge house and their kids, my step-cousins had every great toy you could want.

I'll never forget the year step-mother no.1 made dinner at their house in Fremont. I was already on my own by then and my best friend from high school, who was now my college housemate was with me. Her parents had gone to Texas for the holiday and she did not want to go, so she came with me. Oh God! Dinner was to be around 2, so we went over there around noon. Step-mother no.1 as still in her bathrobe, drunk and stuffing the turkey. We realized it would be hours before dinner was ready, so we drove over to my aunt Annie's in Livermore where my mother was for the day. We ate there and hung out for awhile. Then we went back to Dad's where things were moving along. We had a few drinks to ease the pain. Finally, we ate. Ugh! Misery. Raw turkey. Finally we got out of there. Before we went home, we stopped at my aunt Frances' in Hayward and, of course, ate there. We had eaten 3 Thanksgiving dinners that day!

Whenever I begin to feel sorry for myself - living alone, no children, I think back on that day. All of it. The bounty of food, the family, the dysfunction, the driving around trying to appease all my relatives, the embarrassment of having my friend see that part of my life, etc. and I am grateful that at least I did not duplicate the dysfunction. My father married again. That time to another alcoholic and the last Thanksgiving I had with him, he had to cook it all himself because she was so bad off. My Dad never cooked, but he wanted "a real Thanksgiving" so much he went way out of his comfort zone to try to make it work. Bless his heart.

I know my parents did the best they could. They were the generations that came after the immigrant generation. Children of immigrants who were between cultures. Trying to fit in - "be American". Since my father's parents came here single to work and planned to return 'home', they learned English. WWI broke out and they had to stay here. They met and married. They were from two different countries - Ukraine and Poland.

My mother's parents came from the same village in Sicily. They were married with two children when they came to the U.S. There were lots of Italians in S.F. already, so they could work without having to learn English. They were not forced to assimilate, so they didn't. They were able to retain much of their traditional culture all of their lives.

I knew all my grandparents and learned a lot from them. I am grateful for this as well. I miss them all.

Wishful thinking....

2008-11-19T16:20:00.001-08:00

Sorry I was wrong about Obama's birth year. He was born in 1961, not 1964. But, the Voting Rights Act that Lyndon Johnson signed was in 1964 and it did cause another uprising especially in the South as thousands of people tried to register to vote.

Someone emailed me that Martin Luther King, Jr. was killed in 1964 and that is wrong. He was killed in 1968 the same year as Bobby Kennedy. I remember both events very well.

After Nixon was elected, I stopped voting for nearly 20 years. My friends and I all expected that Nixon would put us in concentration camps. Many of my friends were arrested for their anti-war activities - on other pretexts. "The Movement" went underground. Many just gave up. Others became more militant.

44 Years Ago... and now Obama the 44th President!

2008-11-18T09:46:00.000-08:00

I have decided that I'm taking Sunday off. Getting out, going for a ride, visiting friends, going for a long walk, whatever. This blogging thing can become quite addictive and when you add two on line classes to it and an on line business.... I'm definitely becoming a dull girl. More like a 'duh' girl. Really. I've gotten so I can hardly speak sometimes.

So, this past Sunday, I went to a Wellness Expo in Sonoma, then out to dinner at East West Cafe in Santa Rosa, then to a movie.

The Wellness Expo was 'research and development' since Hamida the Herbalist must keep up with what's going on. I saw many old friends and made some new ones. Of course, Linda Ann was there with her incredible and magical jewels. She is also a Feng Shui practitioner and I know her jewelry is blessed. It emanates such loving and compassionate energy. Go see at her website.

There were way too many 'readers' of various types. Some were downright scary looking. SO SERIOUS! Some sat there looking like they were trying so hard to connect to another world, it almost made me laugh. And what's so bad about that is... that I believe in these things. Unfortunately there are too many people trying to make it 'look' so mysterious when actually it is perfectly normal and natural.

After dinner, I went to see The Secret Life of Bees, a great movie made from an even greater book. It has been my experience that movies rarely are as good as the book they came from, and, sorry to say, it was also true in this case. I was disappointed with the movie. But even though I anticipated this possibility, I wanted to see it on the big screen.

One thing that I realized while I watched the movie that I hadn't gotten when I read the book is that when Lyndon Johnson signed the Civil Rights act in July of 1964, that was a month before Obama was born! Amazing! It also struck me that it was 44 years ago and Obama is the 44th president!

Part of the movie is about racism in South Carolina during that period and how the voting rights act caused uprisings in the South. Here we are 44 years later with an African-American president and a bunch of 'stuff' has been stirred up again. What I fail to understand is how the granting of civil rights to any group of people takes away from others? If one is free, aren't we all free?

Hope Restored

2008-11-06T16:08:00.000-08:00

Today I am so proud of America. We finally did something right!

I remember as a child listening to the radio before going to school and hearing all what was going on in Little Rock, Arkansas. It hit me so hard I dreaded driving through there 23 years later. Then Birmingham, Alabama and Mississippi and all those terrible things that happened in the 50's.

My mother taught me to accept people and I couldn't understand what was going on. It set me on a path to work for civil rights, sometimes actively, sometimes behind the scenes by my example.

When I was 12, my best friends and I campaigned for Kennedy by holding signs at a rally downtown Hayward when Nixon came to give a speech. A man came up and offered us a dime to leave.

When Kennedy created the Peace Corps, I decided that some day I would go and I did. I was 27 and I was an ESL teacher. I went to Zaire and taught at the University in Lubumbashi. I have to admit, I learned more than I taught. It was a challenge to be in the minority, but it gave me a little insight into how it feels.

Even though I was expecting to return to the U.S., I remembered the story of my grandmother who only planned to come to America for a couple years to earn money to send back to her parents, then return home. WWI broke out and she was not able to return to her family in Poland and had to make a life here. So... I was preparing myself for the same thing. What if I couldn't go "home" and had to stay there and make a new home?

That was a long time ago, but through the years, whenever I was in a position to stand up for someone, challenge racism, or offer support, I have done so.

When I lived in Louisiana, I came up against racism on a regular basis. It shocked me. Here it was the 80's and this XXXX was still going on. I really couldn't believe it. Having lived there and seeing it for myself, the way people were treated after Katrina didn't surprise me. The only difference was that the rest of America saw it too, finally. Louisiana was the most backwards place I had ever lived. It was like they were in a time warp.

Let's face it folks, there hasn't been much to celebrate lately. But this election of Obama has made me so happy. I believe, if nothing else, it has inspired young people and that is the most important thing anyone can do.

Election day I found out that my polls were closed and I was supposed to vote by mail. I don't like voting by mail, so when the ballot came, I thought I had an option, so I tore it up. Fortunately, I was outside when my neighbor was walking her dogs and we discussed the ads that Google posted without my knowledge or consent.

KPFA was broadcasting about election issues and gave out a hotline number if we had problems. So I called and found out that I had to drive 15 miles to the County Center and the Registrar of Voters Office. I did it because it was too important to miss. Even though I felt sure my one vote would not make that much difference, I wanted to be a part of history.

I am so glad I lived long enough to see this.

Someone said something that night that was very significant:

Rosa Parks sat so that Martin could march.
Martin marched so that Obama could run.
Obama ran so that my children can fly.

ANNOUNCEMENT: I DO NOT SUPPORT THAT GOOGLE AD!

2008-11-03T10:44:00.001-08:00

Dear Friends and Readers
I have been out of town for two days and I see that Google has taken the opportunity to post an ad that I DO NOT SUPPORT. I removed it from this site and must now go to my other sites to see if it is there also. I am so sorry this happened. If any of you have been following me, especially on Wise Women of the West, which is more personal, you know that I accept everyone. We are All One. Where ever there is Love, it is a Holy Union and sanctified.

Please forgive me for not knowing about this sooner, but I was at the 2012 Conference in San Francisco and just had all my paradigms updated.

Whatever Floats Your Boat

2008-10-21T13:23:00.000-07:00

I haven't been posting this week except for my Issue of the Week on my herbal blog because my 'sweetie' has been visiting from Mexico where he lives on his boat. This the fulfillment of his life's dream. He wanted me to go with him, but I couldn't hack living on a boat. So.... I've been down there twice this year and he's been up here twice.

Anyway, I wanted to write a bit about the conference I'm going to in San Francisco Halloween weekend. 2012 Conference, San Francisco - Shift Happens.

Many years ago, I was working on a PhD. in Mayan Studies at Tulane University in New Orleans. I have been interested in the Maya for at least 40 years. I taught courses on Mayan Hieroglyphs and Mayan Culture through the Extension program at Sonoma State University.

Because of my academic background, I was always skeptical of "2012" stuff. I knew it was the end of a calender period of 5125 years, but it was the end of a cycle within many many cycles and so, as such, no more significant than the end of a millennium for us. Of course, each time a millennium ends, people in modern culture have predicted an 'end of the world'.

I'm not sure why I decided to check out a book by John Major Jenkins entitled 'Maya Cosmogenesis: 2012'. I don't recall the chain of events right now. This led me to an Internet search, which led me to this conference, which I have decided to attend.

The book is incredible. He has integrated the anthropological and archaeological information with astronomy and some 'New Age' teachings. In some cases, he makes logical leaps that are not necessarily appropriate, but in the long run, his results make total sense to me.

He makes the case that the Maya knew about the precession of the equinoxes and rather than designing their calender on a historical or mythological beginning, they worked backwards from an 'end date', Dec. 21, 2012. This is when the Sun will line up with the Galactic Center of our Milky Way Galaxy and this will be visible just before sunrise at particular latitudes.

His argument is well backed up by data and it is convincing. So what? you might well say. Scientists have determined that the center of our galaxy is a 'black hole'.

Wikipedia has this to say:
"A black hole is a theoretical region of space in which the gravitational field is so powerful that nothing, not even electromagnetic radiation (e.g. visible light), can escape its pull after having fallen past its event horizon. The term derives from the fact that the absorption of visible light renders the hole's interior invisible, and indistinguishable from the black space around it."

The Maya saw this black hole as the womb of the Great Mother, thus the place of Creation. The Sun was the Father. Thus when the Sun and the GC came together, Creation happened. This occurs every 26,000 years.

In light of this information and the scientific data regarding black holes, we may well ask ourselves what will happen. According to Jenkins, it is not just a finite period of one day, but rather of years leading up to and following the actual alignment. We are already in that period of years. In addition, in Mayan calendrics, time cycles overlap. They don't just end and begin. It is not 2007 on Dec. 31 and 2008 on Jan. 1. Rather there is a period of time toward the end of the year that overlaps with the beginning of the next year. Time is seen as cyclic, not linear.

Could all the upheaval that is occurring in society at this time be part of the "Shift"? I think so. Many institutions have been under scrutiny and some are crumbling or changing. Many people are living in fear these days about their future. The Earth itself is undergoing rapid change due to Global Warming. Where will it all lead?

I invite your comments.

Happy Birthday Wise Women of the West!

2008-10-14T10:33:00.000-07:00

What a great way to celebrate our one year birthday! Late in the day yesterday we decided to enter the most recent Entrecard Contest and...... and.... WE WON! Not first prize, but hey! 10,000 points. is great. Winning a prize is great. Thanks Entrecard for the acknowlegement and what a lucky break it came on our BIRTHDAY!!!

Altered Events Blog - One of my Favs

2008-10-13T16:15:00.000-07:00

I love this blog for a number of reasons: 1.Her posts are regular and frequent;
2.She uses photos and other graphics that are interesting and load quickly;
3.Her crafts are unique and magical;
4.The blog is informative and has useful adverts, offers, and links.
5.I love the holiday countdown widgets on the bottom of the page and
6. She supports a lot of bloggers and artists by linking to them and their work.

The blog is not only personal, but also features and supports others. It is great to find yourself mentioned in one of her posts. It makes me want to create costumes and jewelry, just to be featured there. LOL It is inspiring.

Tour of Morocco - Feast for the Senses - Fez Sacred Music Festival

2008-10-05T14:22:00.000-07:00

Next May, 2009, I'll be leading a tour of Morocco, one of my favorite places on earth. I have posted a complete description of the tour on my website.

The tour will include highlights from my trips there plus some new features. Some of the places we will go are not on the typical tourist tours.

If you want more information add a comment to this post and I will get back to you. The deadline for deposits is coming up soon and we only have a few openings left. Don't miss this one. A trip to remember.

My Top EC Droppers for September

2008-10-01T11:46:00.000-07:00

Thanks so much to my top-droppers. I have been so busy doing other things lately I haven't reciprocated. Sorry about that. Now that the weather is changing I will probably be on-line more.

Alteredevents
Stir The Cauldron
Happy Thoughts, Happy Tot
2 Witches Blog
Designing Hilary
My gypsygoods
Communique by Ivanhoe
Greener Pastures
Thyme2dream
The Homesteading Housewife

Faubourg Treme

2008-09-23T13:14:00.000-07:00

Sunday I went to see a film at the Sonoma Film Institute, which is located on the Sonoma State University Campus. It was called "Faubourg Tremé: The Untold Story of Black New Orleans". Here's the synopsis they wrote:

"This first-person documentary by New Orleans natives Dawn Logsdon and Lolis Eric Elie brings alive the long history of Black New Orleans through an in-depth look at one historic neighborhood, the Faubourg Tremé. Elie, an award-winning New Orleans newspaperman, bought a dilapidated house in Tremé in the 1990's, and through the process of renovation became obsessed with the area's mysterious and neglected past. Progressive and racially mixed from its founding in the late 1700s, Tremé represented the largest community of free Black people in the antebellum Deep South. Elie interviews residents, artists, scholars, even a few historical reenactors to uncover Tremé's prominent place in the national struggle for civil rights. Shot largely before Hurricane Katrina and edited afterwards, the film is both celebratory and elegiac in tone." (2008, 79 min.)
It can be ordered from the website.

It was a great film. Well worth seeing. In fact, I will probably buy a copy. It truly captured the community spirit that exists throughout the area. Treme is now known as the 6th Ward.

There are many small neighborhoods within the larger suburban area. They are often named after a street or subdivision name. Within those neighborhoods, families have lived for generations. They don't leave. Where else is there to go? Part of the tragedy of Katrina is that these traditions which have lasted for sometimes more than 100 years, were disrupted in such a way that they can never be regained. In some ways they limited people, because it's hard to break away from family. These neighborhoods functioned like traditional villages. Everyone had their place. Secure, yes - Progressive, usually not. They had a culture all their own which was rich and unique.

I lived in New Orleans and nearby suburbs for 8 years from 1981-1989. It was quite an experience and one I will never forget. For part of the time, I lived across the river in Westwego, a small township at the end of the Huey Long Bridge. Though minuscule in size, it had it's own court and judge, and police department. If you lived there you had to pay for a special sticker for your car. I was surrounded by people who considered me a 'Yankee.' One of the customs was that as family members matured and married, they just moved into the house across the street or next door to their parents and so just yelled out to each other when they wanted to talk. My husband, from New England, and I had a lot of trouble with this.

There were many little parades which started from the parking lot of the Catholic Church at the end of the block and wound through the 5 or 6 square blocks of the town. They had bands and tiny floats and threw candy at you. Mardi Gras behavior happens frequently down there.

Westwego was segregated with blacks on one street and whites on another. When my husband and I rented to a black family, the neighbors called the police every day until our tenants just couldn't stand it any more and moved. One time I had a tenant (white) who didn't pay his rent. I went to the 'judge' who ordered an eviction, then came to the house in person, opened the door of the apartment and proceeded to throw the tenant's furniture out into the street. I couldn't believe it. This would never happen in California. I protested that this was not okay with me, but the judge said it was entirely within the law.

I never thought I would be able to leave New Orleans because it grabs hold of you in a way that cannot be described. I felt glad to leave when I did. But....I have always missed it for a quality that is way beyond words. It's a feeling, a sensation. With the destruction of these neighborhoods, the dispersal of all these people and whatever 'they' decide to put there in place of what was .... it is over. On the other hand, New Orleans being a very Plutonic place, has risen out of the ashes (read floodwaters) like the phoenix, many times before. It won't be the same, but it could be wonderful.

Today is Pirate's Day

2008-09-19T19:12:00.000-07:00

While doing my daily dropping (ECs) LOL, I found out that today is

Pirate's Day. I have no idea where that came from. But
in case you think I have no sense of humor, I thought I'd add this

'test' so you can find out if you are a pirate.

You Are 75% Pirate

Shiver me timbers! You be a tried an' true buccanneer.

Yer likely the captain - shoutin' orders to scrub the deck or walk the plank.

If anyone questions yer shipmate skills, ye'll jus' crush the'r barnacles!

Ye have been flying the Jolly Roger fer a long time. So long that you likely be havin' a bad case o' scurvy.

Would You Make a Good Pirate?

Seeing the Light

2008-09-18T15:08:00.000-07:00

Even though Fall has always been my favorite season, but it is also been when the most painful things have occurred in my life.

September is a challenging month for me. Sept. 12, 2005, my mother died; Sept. 20, 1980, my father died. Over the years, many of my cats have died in September. Last year, in September, my sweetie sailed away to Mexico, where he still lives on his boat. He has no intention of returning to the States except to renew his visa.

Last week, on my mother's Urs (return to the Beloved), I went to see the Chihuly exhibit at the De Young Museum in San Francisco. My mother used to take me to the De Young when I was a child. In fact, we had my birthday picnic there when I was 9 or 10. In May, San Francisco can be foggy and it definitely was that day. We took lots of pictures which I still have. Me and mom, my aunt Frances, my cousins Frank, George, Kathy, and Charles. The Japanese Tea House, the De Young Museum, the Aquarium. Part of my childhood. Part of my present.

I miss the old museum, but I have gotten used to the new one. Now I am a member, so I get in for 'free' along with a guest. I got the two tickets then found two women, about the same age as me and my mom. I asked to older woman if she was going to buy a ticket. When she said yes, I gave her my 'mom's' ticket, saying "on behalf of my mother, I'd like to offer you this ticket." She was flustered for a moment, not quite getting it, but finally her daughter said thanks.

When I first heard of this exhibit, I was not that interested in seeing it. But I began to hear so many good things about it, I thought I should see it. I decided it was a good place to 'take my mother' for the day. It turned out to be perfect.

As I looked at the magnificent glass sculpture, I remembered that my mother had started collecting glass art in the last 10 years of her life. She had all kinds of glass baubles in her house - vibranty colored and light-filled. She would have loved the exhibit. It was the perfect way to celebrate her. There was one piece about 20 feet high that was a glass version of the vision she gave me when she died. The pieces in the picture above are up to six feet high.

I started thinking about the artist. How does someone manage to maintain a goal like that? Especially when they are just beginning. What sustains them? Did they say at 12 years old - 'I want to be an artist' and the universe supported them until they became famous? I always wonder about this. Most of us have dreams - then 'reality' makes us do boring, soul-deadening work to 'make a living'. It is more like 'making a dying'. We end up middle-aged with all our dreams like dead leaves at our feet and wonder what happened to our life. I guess an artist is sustained by his/her vision despite poverty or solitude.

So, while viewing this exhibit, I started thinking about what I had wanted to be as a child. A writer. I used to read a lot. In fact, I had read everything of value in the children's section of the library by the time I was 10. I knew the librarian. She let me check out books from the adult section. So, by the time I was 12, I had read all of the classics of American and English literature. I had two best friends, Beth and Katie, and we challenged each other to read 'the list'. We discussed the books and wrote poetry and plays using the themes and characters in the books. We didn't cheat and say we had read something if we hadn't. We became the playwrights for our class and often wrote plays that the class or even the school performed.

I was inspired by Little Women, Louisa May Alcott. When I realized this was partly autobiographical, I was fascinated. I read all her books, believing I was following her life. I decided that this was what I wanted to do. But my life was not as interesting as hers, or so I thought. Actually her life was not that unusual. What made it different was that it took place a hundred years ago. Yet it had inspired dreams and fantasies in me. So I learned the value and power of writing and I wanted to do it too.

When I got older and faced my future, I didn't want to marry and have children, because it was so mundane. I wanted a life of adventure. I have had a little of both. I have done things that few of my contemporaries would even contemplate. On the other hand, my choices have made other choices impossible. Now, when my friends are grandparents, I can't really relate. I never had children - by choice.

Now that we are moving into Fall, the light has changed and it has already gotten cold. I am melancholy. I have a daily practice of meditation and self-examination. I have been questioning and evaluating my decisions over the past year. What will I do with the rest of my life? I decided, after the other day at the museum, to pick up the novel I started a few years ago and start working on it again.

Top Ten EC Droppers for August

2008-09-01T12:07:00.000-07:00

Thanks to my Top 10 Droppers for August!

Stir The Cauldron
2 Witches Blog
People You Need to Know
Thyme2dream
Communique by Ivanhoe
Diet Pulpit
Blue Turtle
Passport2Cruising
Money from Nothing
Robin's Woods

Limited Time Offer from Amazon

2008-08-25T14:47:00.000-07:00

By following this link, you may be eligible to buy the Amazon Kindle, a reading device which has more than 160,000 books, newspapers and blogs available, for a $100 discount.

Forestville Town Social

2008-08-25T14:11:00.000-07:00

Last Thursday, Wise Women of the West participated in the Forestville Town Social and Business Expo. I had a booth featuring my herbal products and cordials. There were many more booths than last year and not as many people came. I didn't make as much as last year, but I did meet many great people and from what I heard, I did much better than others. I got a little carried away as I usually do, talking with people and was not paying as much attention as I should have and either I dropped some of my money or someone did not pay (or both) Yikes! I don't think I dropped it since surely someone would have said something.

I remember one exchange that was odd and I'm not sure the woman actually paid me, yet let me give her change. When I added up my sales and the money I had, it was that amount that was lacking.

I was up half the night counting and checking and I was definitely short. I really did not want to believe that someone stold from me. I make all my products from scratch, using high quality ingredients locally grown and gathered or brought back from other countries I visit. In all cases, there is a great deal of time, expense and effort in making them. I create my own recipes - many come from inspiration. All are unique.

Any artist or craftsperson who tries to sell their creations at fairs knows how much work is involved. It is a labor of love. But that does not mean that you want to just give it away. I was both hurt and disappointed. And of course, I blamed myself for not being "more business-like" and or more careful.

The woman herself may not have realized she didn't pay me. It may not have been intentional at all. This is what I prefer to think because it gives me more peace of mind.

Happy 80th - Little Mother

2008-08-20T10:47:00.000-07:00

Today would have been my mother's 80th birthday and, knowing her, she would rather be where she is than say she was 80. Bless her heart, she passed away three years ago. She did not accept aging very well. She fought it tooth and nail. Her death was a shock to everyone who knew her.

We were packed and ready to go on a trip back to where my grandparents came from in Sicily. She had been complaining about her feet hurting. It interfered with her tap-dancing. Yes, at 75 she had fulfilled one of her lifelong dreams of being a tap-dancer and performed regularly as a member of the Golden Follies at local functions in the Hayward area. In fact, they had a big show at Chabot College and it was filmed.

She had named me after Judy Garland because when she was a kid, the Wizard of Oz had inspired her with the dream of singing and dancing, which she was unable to fulfill herself. Like many parents, she tried to 'force' me to do what she felt she could not do. Believe me, when I saw her dancing on stage for the first time, I was overjoyed. For her, that she had made her dream come true, and for me, that I was finally off that hook. She had just danced a few weeks before.

She also rowed a whaleboat with a crew of women older than her once a week in Lake Merritt, Oakland. They were on the boats by 8am every Wednesday morning. She had to drive about 20 miles to get there. She had just been there a couple of weeks before.

She was president of her local chapter of the Native Daughters of the Golden West, traveling all over the state for their fund-raising program for children who needed medical care.

She was an incredible woman to have as a mother. We were more like friends. Only 20 years apart, there were more years between her and her oldest sister, than between us. She was the youngest of nine. She had seven older sisters (who always had a comment for everything she did), but she loved them all. One of her greatest dreads was that she would bury them all. God bless her, she didn't have to.

As a kid, she taught me to eat right, by example. We always had fresh fruit and vegetables in the house. We never had junk food around. Soda and ice cream were treats we only had at birthday parties. She cooked at home every day, even though she always worked outside the home, usually full-time. She believed that a woman should have job skills and be able to be independent, to take care of herself.

She would come back to kill me if I told you of the adventures we had together during the 60s. Knowing I will see her again someday, if not tonight in my dreams, I won't say a word.

When I was 48 and she was 68, we both went sky-diving for my birthday. I have a video of her floating through the air. She looks like she is totally blissed out. That same year we went to Crete together and had a marvelous and sometimes challenging trip.

We laughed until we wet our pants more than once. I haven't laughed like that since she died. We smoked cigarettes and drank brandy together, knowing it was no good for us. She nagged me all the time about my weight and the fact that I never exercise. She became a weight trainer at 24 hour fitness at 68! I'm 60 and I'm lucky if I can walk 1/2 a mile.

About a week before our trip, her blood pressure went sky high. She had my sister take her to the emergency room. They admitted her. When I got there, they said they wanted to do tests, but she would probably be going home in a day or two. Apparently, before I got there, they had told her that she was going to be on dialysis three times a week, would have to stop driving and would need an oxygen tank.

My mom, who had been driving the tour van for the senior center full of people my age - not being able to drive! No way. During the early hours of the next morning, she tried to leave like a lady. Her heart just stopped. But, not having her DNR done yet, which she planned to do when we got back from Sicily, they brought her back and put her on machines. She never regained consciousness, her organs shut down and did not come back and so after 3 days she went into the light. Her boyfriend and I stayed with her day and night for those 3 days.

Hurricane Katrina had hit only a few days before she went to the hospital. I used to live in New Orleans and knowing my mother, she watched it all on T.V. thinking about what 'could have' happened to me if I still lived there. She was like that. Worrying about what could have, should have, might have been. Also, her name was Katherine. I know she cried when she saw all the people suffering, she had a huge heart and a lot of compassion. I believe that Hurricane Katrina broke my mother's heart and when she saw that no one was helping people, she just wanted to get down there and do something herself. She had planned to join the Red Cross Relief program a few years before, but hadn't gotten around to it. She was probably sorry she wasn't there - playing with the kids; cooking and serving food.

After she died, I felt like part of my body was permanently removed. My life has totally changed. Gone the 5 hour phone calls, the laughing, the crying together. I have never cleared her voice messages off my unified messaging system, but I haven't listened to them either. I can't face dealing with her belongings which are stacked up in my house and in storage. Everytime I open a box, her perfume fills the air and I am sad again. She loved expensive perfume and I will say this for it, it lasts.

I ask for her help all the time. I hear her 'nagging' me every day. I miss her something terrible.

Happy Birthday, Little Mother. Thank you for everything.

Upcoming Tour of Morocco 2009

2008-08-17T14:11:00.000-07:00

Now that the eclipse is past (see my astrology blog thedesertsky.blogspot.com for more about that) I am ready to announce my upcoming tour of Morocco for 2009. It will feature the best of the three trips I've made there plus the Fez Sacred Music Festival 2009. They have not set the program for next year yet, but you can visit the website for this year's program.

I have been wanting to create and lead my own tour for quite awhile now and with the help of friends, it is set up.

Click here to view the brochure.

This is going to be a very special trip. Send the deposit now to secure your spot. You still have plenty of time to save up your blog earnings (LOL) for the rest of the trip.

Hope to hear from you soon. If you have questions, leave a comment.

In His Own Words

2008-08-15T09:43:00.000-07:00

My cousin Frank wrote an account of this experience. Here it is...He sent it to us in an email and I thought I would post it just like that. He's the one in front wearing the white hat.

"Dear Family, Friends, and Running Buddies,

I wrote for somebody that wanted the complete story of my run. I thought I would share it with you all.

The 2008 San Francisco Marathon: Call it an epic adventure or a story of survival.

At the start the weather was cool and comfortable. There was magic in the air. Thousand of runners were gathering in the dark with the city lights adding a nice glow. The excitement was building and we were ready to go. The music engulfed us. The elite runners took off at 5:35 and the waves of runners followed. That moment it was great to be alive and in the City. The smell of fresh bread greeted us on our way then came the smell of stinky crabs at Fisherman's Warf. We ran along the waters edge on the bay and then up to our first speed bump, a short but very steep hill. No problem. We ran past Fort Mason and through Chrissy Field. We were then faced with the most daunting hill up to the bridge for about a mile. No problem. Then on to the bridge where they split one lane for runners to go both ways. It was a problem. To add to it, there were wind gusts so strong our bibs were almost ripped off. We were just happy to be running across this treasure. The only problem was a lot of people didn't understand runners etiquette which was needed to transverse the tight roadway. At times I and others felt like yelling "lead, follow, or get out of the way", but I remained jovial and darted around the wafflers with my pace group. My brother Steve and nephew Rafey greeted me on the bridge and snapped lots of pictures. After the bridge we faced the second biggest hill for about 3/4 mile. No problem. The training really helped on these two hills. We then got to coast down a hill for a awhile and then off to flat stretch. We entered Golden Gate Park and ran up a slope/hill that lasted forever. At the halfway mark my legs reminded me of the hills I ran. And then out of the blue a "convergence". All of the Half Marathon runners that were running the second half descended on us. Again no runners etiquette. Again, I was thinking "lead, follow or get out of the way". This did slow me down somewhat. We continued through the park and around Stow Lake which is quite scenic. It was a real familiar site. I was making good time. We ran down Haight Street. It was a nice run all the way to Market Street. I was in good shape. We went through a flat stretch which was not scenic. Miles 22, 23 and 24 included industrial/commercial buildings and three hills. I got over the first hill keeping pace and feeling good with just a little heaviness in my legs. Hills 2 and 3, not so good. The scenery didn't help. Mile 25 was beautiful and inspiring but my legs were cramping due to all of the challenges along the way. It was my slowest mile. No matter what, I knew I had to finish strong for the last 1.2 miles. I sucked up the pain in my legs and I came racing in. I totally sprinted in the final .2 There were plenty of people cheering including family and my Pace Group. I am not sure how I did it but I did. I did have my "dark side" moments. My goal was to break 4:30 but I am happy with the 4:39.24. My brother Steve thought under normal circumstances I would have run 4:20. The culmination of all the hills and slopes were really challenging. The training did prepare me for the hills but you have to experience them to really know. It is something you have to process and work through as you go. I hope you enjoyed my story. I am now doing a lot of walking to help me recover. The only injury I have is one black toenail. I am plenty sore but in a good way. I will start running in two weeks. Next up: The San Jose Rock 'n Roll Half Marathon in October. It is smooth and flat. I can really gauge myself with this one. To follow is the Honolulu Marathon in December. I will be training with some of my running buddies for this one. I have truly been bitten by the running bug. May you all be bitten by something new and exciting in your lives.

Peace, Love and Joy

Frank"

Frank my Hero!

2008-08-14T13:30:00.001-07:00

He did it again! This time he ran 26.2 miles over the Golden Gate Bridge and around the city of San Francisco.

While I was writing about "buckets" and barely able to walk from here to there, my 'hero' and cousin, Frank was training for, then running, the SF Aids Marathon. Bless his heart.

And now, he's getting ready to do another one! in Honolulu. He's says he's got the bug and loves running.

I've caught a bug too, blogging. In my case, it entails hours of sitting on my duff and loving it! LOL

In his case it means running his duff off! LOL He says he last another 12 pounds. He weighs less now than he did in high school. Here he is at the finish line. Still on his feet - amazing! How do they do that! Hours of running? Amazing! Makes me tired just thinking about it. Well... someone's got to do it. More power to you.

Momma Mia? in Greece?

2008-08-11T17:19:00.000-07:00

Now that I have 4 blogs and a website, as well as producing my herbal products etc., etc., in other words, my own business, I work more than ever. And it's fine because I am home and I am my own boss.

I have promised myself that I will take Sunday off and I usually do. This past Sunday, I went to my dream analysis group in the morning, then went to a movie.

Somewhere, I had heard that Momma Mia was worth seeing. Wellllll. I almost walked out demanding a refund. Dumb, dumber and dumbest. Sorry. I was so dismayed at what is being doled out in the name of entertainment. The only redeeming features, for me, were seeing Meryl Streep singing and dancing, and the scenery. It takes place on a Greek Island. I like Meryl Streep and it was impressive to see her dancing her butt off and belting out songs. I think it really was her singing, but I can't say the same for some of the other actors.

I was also upset that they had their timing so off. They imply the mother and her three boyfriends knew eachother in the Sixties. However, the daughter is only 20 and the music is ABBA. Sooooo. that's Eighties right? Very confusing. I hate it when they mix up stuff like that when the players (me and other Boomers) are still alive to consult. I mean, the Sixties!!! It wasn't that long ago!

The songs went on way too long. Meryl looked bored singing her own songs! Of course, there is a lot of fodder for the pre-teen set. I think they make most films with 10-12 year old girls in mind. Now, I know the economy is in trouble, but did I miss something? Who controls the money in this country? Oh right, forgot for a minute, children.

Oh yes, my last complaint. Momma Mia takes place in Greece. They don't say "Momma Mia" in Greece.

The other redeeming feature, I laughed myself silly through most of the movie. I guess that was worth the senior discount ticket price.

Harry Potter and the Return of Knitting

2008-08-05T17:03:00.000-07:00

I don't know about you, but once I started reading Harry Potter, I was hooked. Now I wait for the movies. J.K. Rowling has something new!

The Tales of Beedle the Bard by J.K. Rowling Available for Pre-Order
Thursday, July 31, 2008.

The Tales of Beedle the Bard by J.K. Rowling is now available for pre-order on Amazon. This book of fairy tales was written to supplement the Harry Potter series and will be published in two new editions on December 4, 2008. The Standard Edition features all five fairy tales from the original The Tales of Beedle the Bard, a new introduction by J.K. Rowling, illustrations reproduced from the original handcrafted book, and commentary on each of the tales by Professor Albus Dumbledore. Amazon’s exclusive Collector's Edition includes a reproduction of J.K. Rowling's handwritten introduction, as well as 10 additional illustrations not found in the Standard Edition.

It is my belief that the Harry Potter books and movies contributed to making knitting popular again. Prior to them, hardly anyone knitted anymore and when you looked for yarn, there was little choice.

In the early 90s, I remember being in a class for docents at the historic site where I worked. The lecturer asked the class, mostly retired women over 65 and me (43 at the time), how many knitted. Two people raised their hands out of around 30. I was surprised. I thought surely these older women knew how. My mother tried it once and dropped it. Bless her heart, she did start with a very difficult pattern and small needles.

In the 70s, knitting declined except for crafts people. You were lucky if you could find anything but acrylic worsted weight yarn in more than 6 colors in most shops. Then Harry Potter came out and Mrs. Weasley who was always making "jumpers" scarves and hats for her kids and Harry; plus the needles that knitted by magic (wish I had those) and soon we were awash in hundreds of colors and textures.

I predicted that after everyone had made 3 scarves for everyone they knew, the whole thing would die down again. Which it has. It's one thing to make a scarf, quite another to make a sweater. Most people don't have the patience it requires and most people are not willing to redo it multiple times until they get it right.

When Harry Potter first came out, there was a lot of conrovery about it. Even here in Northern California - supposedly the land of fruits and nuts - some schools banned it. Can you imagine?

On the other hand, I visited Salt Lake City, Utah a couple of years ago and heard a local teacher being interview on the radio. He said that he used Harry Potter as a motivational force in his classes. Kids took a renewed interest in all subjects that were taught at Hogwarts. While kids did not show any interest in Chemistry, they were fascinated by Potion-making. Kids who had poor penmanship and didn't want to write by hand anymore, really got into Calligraphy. Botany became Herbology, etc., etc. There was an article in the local newspaper about how teachers were successfully using Harry Potter in schools just like this guy on the radio. Clever and innovative.

I was a bit surprised at this reaction to HP in Salt Lake City, while at home the debate was still going on as to whether HP was 'evil' and 'dangerous to young minds.'

USPS Si, UPS No

2008-08-04T16:29:00.000-07:00

It was the second post I did on this blog. It was called "Roadkill...." I thought it would get a response from postal workers, but it didn't. Anyway, here we go again. UPS left a 46 pound parcel on my doorstep Thurs. late afternoon. Wrong address, wrong name, wrong town, wrong zip code. This would never happen at the Post Office. The carriers know every address on their route and often everyone who lives at each address. If they can't find a house (because mailboxes are frequently far from a house in the country or woods) they don't leave parcels on front porches of any house they can find. They don't do it and keep their jobs that is.

This is the fourth time UPS has misdelivered parcels to my house that I know of. Twice my parcels were either left at the end of a dirt road in the middle of winter, when my house is clearly visible all around or dropped in the road (parcel containing glass), reported as delivered while they returned it to the sender three days later. Then twice they have left other people's packages on my porch.

So here we are, Monday, and they finally came back to get it. They didn't knock or leave a note that they had come, they just took it. I know because I was here. But just suppose I wasn't here and actually the parcel was stolen? Then whose fault would it be? Would they accuse me? Not a good way to do business.

I see they finally have gotten some new trucks, but they have not improved service.

Meanwhile my letter carrier, has had his route cut. That means he works 5 days one week and 6 days the next week. He gets 2 days off one week and 1 day off the next. And less pay because the "evaluated" time is shortened. Rural carriers are paid by the day, no matter how many hours it takes.

And people still make "going postal" jokes. How would you react to this treatment?

I met a psychotherapist the other day who leads groups for postal workers. He said he used to include them with others, but soon saw that they had special problems and needs, so he made separate therapy groups just for them. He said he could hardly believe the stories. I told him I don't know what they told you, but even without hearing, I will say this: based on own my experience working for the Postal Service, they are all true.

It's a shame that given the responsibility and the huge, yet fantastic job they do, they still have to treat their employees so badly. They might say the reason the service is so good is because of their employee policy. Who knows.

I prefer to see it the way I saw it when I worked there. I was told that carrying the mail was like a sacred trust. It was not just a job but a tradition, part of the founding of this nation. Benjamin Franklin started it here, but the phrase "Neither snow, nor rain, nor sleet, nor dark of night shall keep them from their appointed task." was said by Herodotus way back during the ancient Greek period when couriers ran documents from one town to another.

Most of the time, I carried junk mail and tons of catalogs, but sometimes, it was a card to Grandma for her birthday from a child in Iowa. The address might read, "Grandma Jones on Westside Road." Well, I sorted that mail everyday and I knew who Jones was on Westside Road. And I knew she was old enough to have a grandchild, so even though the address was incomplete, I could get it there on time. Or the people who waited by the mailbox, expecting a check. I knew my arrival would make them happy, because I knew I had it in my tray.

Christmas was especially good. Yes, we killed ourselves walking up endless slippery steps in the rain, but when someone opens a door and sees a load of boxes from family members all over the country and you are the one carrying them, you get all the smiles. Those were the kind of moments that made all the xxxx I got from management or even fellow employees, bearable. And yes, sometimes I actually miss it. But not right now and not on 100 degree days.

My Top Ten EC Droppers for July

2008-07-31T17:56:00.001-07:00

Stir The Cauldron
Goddess Blessings
A Bit of This and That
Robin's Woods
2 Witches Blog
SPIRITUALITY
People You Need to Know
Enchanted Cauldron
cooking with kuting
Blue Turtle

Since I can't figure out how to get a "real top-dropper widget" on my page, I'll just do it this way, since I want to give credit to those who have been so diligent in dropping.

Where I live the only Internet connection available is dial-up. I'm lucky if I can get 30 drops a day on my two blogs that have Entrecard. We are allowed 300 each, but I'd have to do this 24/7 just to get 100. Believe me friends, I'd love it if I could get to all of my Favorites everyday. Then there is the issue of posting, adding things that could generate income AND having a life.

Those of you who don't have EC are missing out on a very effective way to generate traffic. My traffic has tripled since I got involved in Entrecard.

July at the County Fair

2008-07-26T17:29:00.000-07:00

Hadn't realized how much time it's been since I posted here. So busy networking with Entrecard and BlogCatalog, no time to write. And now that I've separated into three blogs, I find I'm actually writing more on Hamida the Herbalist.

Thursday and Friday I volunteered with the Master Gardeners at the Sonoma County Fair in Santa Rosa. We always have a demonstration garden and the theme this year was Making a Rain Garden. This includes using the rainwater that comes off your roof in the winter in a specially constructed garden. I found out that 10 inches of rain falling on a 1000 sq. ft. roof results in 6,000 gallons of water. Most homes in the U.S. are twice that size. All this water goes down the storm drains, through pipes and ends up either in lakes, rivers or the ocean. Moving over pavements and roads it picks up toxins such as oil, rubber, chemical fertilizers etc., which go with it to the body of water. The volume often causes flooding. The water is polluted and so when it floods, it carries the pollutants with it.

If we could catch and use the rain where it falls, it would both raise the local water table and help to naturally purify the water.

While the usual displays, games, rides, souvenirs and junk-food were in abundance, there were signs, even here that things are changing. The number of people who were interested in our demo garden was amazing. Many people wanted the plant lists for bringing beneficial critters into their gardens like hummingbirds, bees and butterflies.

And they had a small Green Pavilion featuring companies providing services such as solar power, alternatives to plastic, composting and energy saving appliances. And it was packed with people.

The Democratic Party exhibit had a bumper sticker for Obama that said: GOT HOPE?

There were cakes and jams being judged in the Home Arts Building; roses and flower arrangements in the Garden Building. There were sheep, goats, cattle and hogs being auctioned by a real auctioneer; children sheering their sheep hoping to win a prize. There was an area that smelled like hay and manure, and another of BBQ and popcorn. It all brought tears of joy to my eyes.

Cross-Blogging

2008-07-14T15:05:00.000-07:00

On my other blog Hamida the Herbalist, I feature an issue of the week. The issue this week is Gratitude.

I found myself writing quite a bit about this, so this time, I moved the comments here and kept the flower essences there.

Let me begin with a personal account. I had to go to Tiburon yesterday to pick up some items at the Wooden Boat Show for a friend who is out of the country. Lately, I have been staying home more than usual for a number of reasons: 1) I am conserving on gasoline; 2) I don't like driving much anymore; and 3) I am busy and content at home doing what I'm doing. It was around 120 miles round trip and it was a beautiful day. I figured since I was out, I might do some window shopping and maybe 'hang out' in Tiburon - a high-end place with 'cute' boutiques etc. But I found that when I looked around, there was nothing there that interested me. In fact, all I could think of was getting back home. I looked at all the people on the street and nothing pulled me. I was not attracted to the scene. In fact, what I saw felt empty and meaningless, whereas my home felt alive and full of magical possibilities.

As I was driving back, as fast as I could get away with, I saw all the traffic, bumper to bumper going south back to San Francisco and the peninsula and I thought to myself, as I often do, these people spend their week commuting to work, then their 'days off' driving around looking for amusement and distraction. Do they ever 'stay home'? Why not? This led to the next set of thoughts which was that staying home, staying put is considered not cool or interesting when there's so much to see and do out there.

So I asked the questions: What's wrong with what you have? Don't you enjoy it? Why keep looking out there for more, different, new? Will any of it ever be enough? Many years ago, I did some research on the phenomenon of dissatisfaction that is so strong in the modern world. Why this constant need for more etc. I read a lot about the role advertising plays in making us feel that what we are or have is not enough. We are too fat, too ugly, too old, too stupid or whatever... so we need....this or that. It goes on and on. It is endless. I came upon a book that was a revelation because it talked about how the government funded research in the mid-30s, as the Depression was waning, to find out how to 'jump-start' the economy again. They needed to get people to spend money again. After the failure of the banks, people lost confidence. After going through the Depression, many people had learned to be frugal and do without. People didn't want to spend money as freely as they had before.They wanted to hang on to it. Now, the government wanted to stimulate industry and get people to spend again. A report came out that showed how psychology could be used via advertising, to make people want things, by creating dissatisfaction in their minds about themselves and their lives.

As with many other things that start out benign, but become malignant, the program was extremely successful and has led to the uncontrolled consumerism of today. We are trained to be dissatisfied from birth. It is normal for a child or even (especially) a cat to be considered a 'fussy eater'. Are there any fussy eaters in a drought-ridden African country?

Dissatisfaction is considered so normal in the modern world that, in fact, satisfaction is 1) considered unattainable or 2) considered a sign of stupidity or backwardness.

Shopping has become a recreational activity, whereas before, it was a way to get necessities. All of us have more than we need. But NEED has been redefined to include things that make us happy, things that make us feel good. It is an endless process because in order to be okay, we need the latest electronic device, hairdo, handbag, chocolate truffle etc. On and on. We are never content with what is. How would our lives be different if we were satisfied?

What if we said to ourselves every day, I have everything I need. I am content with myself and my life. To me, this is the basis of gratitude.

For flower essences that can help with Gratitude, see my other blog: hamidatheherbalist.blogspot.com.

Interestingly, as I was doing my daily 'drop' routine, I came across Michael Nolan's blog Frugal Living Tip of the Day which is Thankfulness
Find it at: frugalliving.today.com

So Now For the Bucket

2008-07-13T18:20:00.001-07:00

Took this test and was surprised, since I have not exactly been, nor am I now, a saint. Since I didn't expect to live this long (60), I'm wondering how it will be to live another 27 years.

Do you want to know? What difference would it make?

In 1970 or so I remember wishing on a star. I wanted to know how my life would turn out, what I would do etc. I actually got an answer. The star said, "What would you do if your knew? Would it change what you are doing now? If yes, then change it anyway, without knowing. If no, then all is well and you are where you need to be.

At that moment the answer was "No" since all was well at that time.

I have always used 'Death as an Advisor' after reading Carlos Castaneda's first book, The Teachings of Don Juan, which came out while I was working on my B.A. in Anthropology. I was actually studying Mesoamerica - a term anthropologists coined for a culture area which spanned the U.S. Southwest down to the northern part of Central America. Like others in my generation, the book intrigued me and I got the bug to study Shamanism.

When I did, I realized that Shamanism as it relates to a particular group of people, is rooted in history, language, geography, culture and ancestry. Traditionally, shamans, healers, or other holy people, were chosen by their community. No one in their right mind would walk in and say they wanted to be one. And, no amount of money could buy you the job.

For me, it was impossible to become a Huichol shaman. I might become a Sicilian one (if such a thing existed - Ha! Ha! or a Ukrainian or Polish one - also part of my ancestry).

Since one one my goals in life was to have a happy death, periodically I would look around at my life and ask myself, "If I died right now, would I have a happy death?"

If the answer was NO then time for a change. If YES, then I kept doing what I was doing.

Since it looks like I've got another 27 years, I think I better look around at my current life and answer the question once again.

My Most Memorable July 4th

2008-07-04T13:45:00.000-07:00

This morning as I sat outside drinking my morning coffee and appreciating the silence, I was so grateful for my life. I love it when there's a legal holiday because the sound of commuting traffic echoing in the narrow canyon where I live is absent.

I am grateful for my home, my garden, my current life. I know I am lucky compared to other people. I have seen some of those other people, both here and in other countries.

I began thinking of past July 4ths and the one that stood out was 1976. At the beginning of the year, I was in Africa in the Peace Corps. I regretted not being home for the Bicentennial, but my contract was not yet completed and there was no way I could leave for a vacation at that time of the year.

One thing led to another and I got so ill I had to be "med-evaced" out of the country and ended up in George Washington University Hospital in D.C. having surgery. The night of the July 4th celebration, a group of hospital staff and I watched the Bicentennial Celebration out of the window of my hospital room bathroom. I sat on the toilet seat, the best and only seat in the house, and marveled at how Fate had brought me home for this memorable event.

That night I was proud to be an American. I was glad to be alive (since I had gotten so ill in Africa I didn't know if I would live). And I was relieved to have been able to leave to get the medical attention I needed (which didn't exist where I was). It had taken days to get out of the country, because they would sell tickets but not make reservations. Each day it was first come, first served. People just lined up and pushed and shoved until they got on. Each day, accompanied by someone from the American Embassy, I would go to the airport, wait, and not get on. It was getting drastic as my medical condition worsened.

Finally my chance came. They thoroughly searched my belongings and when they found a coin that I had kept for a souvenir, they accused my of taking their currency out of the country, which was against the law. Fortunately, the embassy person intervened. The plane was already beginning to taxi along the runway. It stopped as I ran towards it. When I got on that PanAm jet, I cried. I felt like I was already on American soil.

My time in the Peace Corps did more for my patriotism than anything else I have ever done. Even though the country I was in was not so bad off (then), it was still such a drastic change from home. I used to dream of being in Safeway. I'd reach for something and it would vanish before I could touch it. In my PC country, "super-markets" had row after row of empty shelves. Sometimes there would be a whole row of one thing, because they had gotten a shipment. We expatriots stock-piled and hoarded. If something came in, the word got round and everyone would run to the store to get it. We had money, but there was nothing to buy.

We had to go to a nearby country for sugar, coffee, flour, gasoline. I had a friend with a land-rover and we made supply runs every few weeks for ourselves and other people. Nothing illegal, just basic foodstuffs. The locals subsisted on manioc, greens, palm oil and pilchards. But few Europeans or Americans could hack a diet like that on a regular basis.

I think that all young people, when they graduate from high school or reach 18, should spend at least one year in a third-world country, so they can appreciate what we have here. Not just the material wealth, but all of it. I have written before about how my students in Africa were hungry for knowledge. They didn't let "poverty" get in their way. They were enthusiastic about learning. They didn't mind if they had one pair of shoes as long as they could get to class. Many people had no shoes.

What does it take to keep America strong?

For me it takes education, appreciation, understanding, compassion and acceptance of differences. It does not take killing, maiming, torturing, force and fire-power. We will never regain the world's respect the way we are going, nor will we gain its love.

These days when I travel, I find myself in the position of having to explain why America is so evil and corrupt. I feel I have to separate myself from the policies of my government, when I live in a democracy. How can we possibly be an example to the rest of the world - which used to look up to us? People in other countries can't understand why we had a coup d'etat and didn't run into the street to stop it.

Now they are talking about Iran.

What are you doing today? Having a BBQ in the backyard with your family? Enjoy. It might be your last.

Another part of us has moved

2008-07-03T14:00:00.001-07:00

I started an astrology blog - thedesertsky.blogspot.com

I moved the astrology posts that were here and added some new ones.

As a give-away, to promote this blog, I am offering a free report called The Sky Within to the first three people who make a comment and include their birth data and email address. I will not publish these comments, they are only for the promotion. Include your date, time and place of birth (name or gender not required) and your email address, so I can send you the report. The report is by Steven Forrest, a well-known astrologer. To win this report, you must include all the required information.

Go the blog and read the post about a New Day, for more information.

For those who don't know, the first part of us that moved was the herbalism, which can now be found at hamidatheherbalist.blogspot.com

Here we will continue with cultural commentary, travel, movies, books, ideas, and observations.

My Bucket List

2008-06-27T13:39:00.000-07:00

As I've said before, I haven't had T.V. service for 14 years, because of the location of my house. There is no cable and it's not worth having a satellite dish, because I don't spend that much time watching. I do have a set, though, and a subscription to Netflix. Since movies are so expensive these days, I tend to wait 'til they come to Netflix before I see them, which could be as much as a year after they come out. Oh well.

I just watched "The Bucket List" with Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson. And, of course, I started thinking about the bucket list I made for myself when I was a kid. Here are the things on the list that I have done so far:

Sky dive
Join the Peace Corps
See the Pyramids
Travel on the Nile
Go on a camel caravan into the Sahara
Become a Whirling Dervish
See the Taj Mahal
Travel all over Mexico
Study Mayan Hieroglyphs
Have a small house in the woods where I can have a garden

Here are the ones left to do:

Write and publish a best-seller
Get an Academy Award
Get married in Machu Picchu
Travel on the Amazon River

Not bad. A couple of those on the to do list might not get done, but so far, my life has been pretty miraculous, so I'm not ruling them out.

Although I have not written 'a book', I have had some things published - articles about California Indians in News From Native California, and articles on Benicia and the Historic State Capitol there in the Solano County Historical Society Journal. I also worked on the illustrations in a book on Mayan hieroglyphs written by one of my professors at Tulane University, which was published - called A Grammar of Mayan Hieroglyphs by V.R. Bricker.

While I did not become a professional epigrapher or Mayanist, I learned enough about Mayan hieroglyphs to teach courses at Sonoma State University.

And I did write the script for published video that shows daily at the Sonoma Barracks - part of the Sonoma State Historic Park in Sonoma, California. It's called Mariano Vallejo and the Northern Frontier and has to do with the role Vallejo played in early California history. In fact, the town I live in now was once a land grant given by Vallejo to an Englishman who "Mexicanized", which was what they had to do to own land in California in those days.

What this meant was: 1. They had to become Catholics, 2. They had to speak Spanish, 3. They had to marry a Mexican national, 4. They had to become citizens of Mexico, 5. They had to change their name to a 'hispanicized' version - John became Juan, etc. There were a few exceptions, but they are rare. Things have changed a bit since then.

Another thing most people don't know about early California history, is that the California State Constitutionwas written in English and Spanish, since most of the signers were from the land-owning majority - who were Mexicans and all documents that came out of the legislature were bi-lingual. This state was bi-lingual from its creation.

I doubt that my video will win an academy award, or that my publications will become best-sellers, but they are all published and out there in the world with my name in or on them.

The two things that may actually prove more difficult are those two travel destinations which are extremely challenging physically and I doubt I'm going to get married again. LOL

There may have been other things on that list from time to time, but whatever they were, they were not important, since I totally forgot about them. In general, I'd say I got to do more than was on my list, because there are many other places I've been and things I've done than were on those lists. I can truly say I am satisfied with my life.

I never wanted children since, even as a child myself, I knew the world was over-populated and that my children or grand-children would suffer from the effects of pollution, lack of resources and degradation of the planet. And I was right.

Because of who I am, I can't help thinking that 'the end' of life as we have known it, is upon us. For the past week, here in Northern California, the orange sky and the smell of smoke due to the numerous forest fires has had all of us coughing. My cats are freeking out. I have been having nightmares.

The SF Chronicle had an article on the front page today about the dying bees and how much we need them for our food supply. One quote was "How would our federal government respond if 1 out of every 3 cows was dying?", Maryann Frazier, a bee expert from the University of Pennsylvania.

These days, all I want is to see bees, birds, and butterflies in my yard. When a hummingbird hovered in front of me then flew directly to the plants I had put in just for her, I knew I had done something right and she was thanking me.

Part of Us Has Moved

2008-06-21T16:37:00.000-07:00

As of a couple of days ago, I created a new blog called Hamida the Herbalist, which can be found at hamidatheherbalist.blogspot.com . It was time to do it. Soon I will be creating a separate blog for astrology. That way, those who want those specific topics won't have to wade through the rest of it. To make the transition sweeter, I'd like to offer sweets. An offering of chocolate. Take the test and see.

You are Milk Chocolate

A total dreamer, you spend most of your time with your head in the clouds.

You often think of the future, and you are always working toward your ideal life.

Also nostalgic, you rarely forget a meaningful moment... even those from long ago.

What Kind of Chocolate Are You?

I'm am totally loving this blog stuff!

It's that Mercury Retrograde Thing Again

2008-06-18T13:24:00.000-07:00

After the previous posting, I realized that I used an expression "dying before death" without sufficient explanation. I assumed (and you know what that means) that it was "self-evident". Sorry. Of course, as with all spiritual teachings, there are a number of ways to explain it. The way I understand it is this: that it is much like the Hindu and Buddhist ideas of non-attachment. Be "in the world, but not of it." Participate in life to the full extent, but know that there is more to life than what you perceive with your five senses. Do your duty, but do not be attached to the outcome (Bhagavad Gita)
Carlos Casteneda's Don Juan said to see Death as an advisor. Live as if you have all the time in the world with the knowledge that you could die any moment. If you knew you only had six months to live, what would you change about your current life? Sometimes our outer circumstances may be impossible to change, but we can always change our attitude about them.
In other words, be unattached to the things of this world, learn to let go (eventually we have to let go of everything, even our bodies), and come to know the spiritual realm while still in this world through connection with God, The One, The Source, Unity or whatever you call it.
And as Sponge Bob would say "Good luck with that!"

Acceptance: Transmuting Loss to Gain

2008-06-17T15:20:00.000-07:00

Haven't posted for awhile because I was focusing on getting ready for All Things Herbal, an herb fair and sale benefitting the Herb Exchange, in Sebastopol. Made three new products. Bottled, wrapped and sealed for days. Made clever new labels and informational sheets. Made handouts for my astrology business. Then woke up with the worst lower back pain I've had in years. Could hardly move. Was not able to go because I knew I was incapable of unloading the car and setting up my canopy and tables, or lugging all the boxes of product. Oh, was I disappointed! Hopefully those who showed up as a result of the 100 emails I sent, were at least happy with the rest of the event.
But then I realized that this disappointment was an opportunity to practice acceptance. Acceptance of what is. One of the most powerful teachings of Sufism is one referred to as "dying before death". While its meaning may be self-evident, its practice is both difficult and rewarding. In this instance, it was a letting-go of "my plan", and submitting to the reality that I could not walk, let alone "lift that bale". Although on a much smaller scale and hopefully short-lived, my temporary disability reminded me that many people every day all over the world, are faced with major changes in their lives due to sudden illness or injury. Death itself often comes suddenly and with no concern for what people may have hoped to do on a particular day.
My disappointment was followed by guilt, shame, and self-judgement that went something like this: "If you had done.... if you had not done..... you always xxxx things up..... why can't you get your xxxx together", etc. I listened for a couple minutes then realized that this was not constructive. With Saturn conjunct my Ascendant right now, self-criticism is highly available. I called a friend who had invited me to her grand-daughter's birthday earlier in the week and told her that since I was not able to do the herb fair afterall, could I come to the party.
So I went and had a delightful time. It was an interesting group of people, mostly adults since Maya is only 1 year old. She lived her first year with her paternal grand-parents in Tunisia and is becoming a tri-lingual child. Throughout the day, we spoke 5 languages (I love this) and the complete tree of Abraham was represented (I love this too).
We all got along although we sometimes did not share eachother's beliefs or opinions. And we said "why can't the world be like this?"
So a day that started out as a loss, turned out to be a gain. All because of a change in attitude. A turning point where grace allowed me to reframe my thinking.

Mercury Retrograde Again

2008-06-05T13:20:00.001-07:00

Mercury went retrograde on May 27 in Gemini and since my Sun and Uranus are both in Gemini, I am really getting the effects. Plus we had a New Moon in Gemini conjunct my Sun and Uranus is squaring my natal Uranus. My birthday was on the 30th and here's what happened: 1) I got an email from a man I dated 34 years ago and don't ever want to see again, but my current boyfriend, who is in Mexico right now, totally forgot. 2) I got a phone call from a woman whom I've known for nearly 50 years, but none of my current friends called. 3)I got locked in my 4 year old Lexus and had to crawl over the console to get out of the passenger side, then after I got it fixed, I backed into a concrete wall (nothing happened though), 4) I finally cleaned the outside of my microwave and after setting off all the touch buttons, it broke - moral: never clean things (I like that).

Yesterday, after spending many hours doing blog stuff, I decided to make several separate blogs, each focusing on one thing, but, is it a good idea to do that during Mercury Retrograde? Probably not. So, I will wait until June 20, when it goes direct again. The message for me is to slow down rather than going along with the impulse to speed up. Mercury, as messenger of the gods, brought information to human beings. As a god of trade, I think he is especially significant for the Internet, which is fast becoming the way people do business. More and more, people are finding ways to make money on the Internet. Honestly, though, I wonder just what it is they are selling. I find some blogs to have no content on them whatsoever.

When I go launch separate blogs, one will be on Astrology, another on Herbalism, and I will keep the one I have now that is considered a mixed bag. Sort of like me.

For an affordable astrology reading see the many reports I feature on the astrologer page of my website

It's Lavender Season

2008-06-01T13:11:00.000-07:00

If you have never used lavender in cooking, here are some ideas and recipes to try. It is important to use organically grown, culinary lavender for obvious reasons. There are some types of lavender that taste "soapy". Make sure you have one that has a more "floral" or "fruity" taste, especially if introducing lavender-laced foods for the first time, to family and friends who may already be skeptical. Basically, there are three ways to use Lavender in cooking:

1. Lavender Sugar

Leave lavender in sugar for 1 week, strain and use sugar in other recipes

2. Lavender Infusion

Steep in water, oil or vinegar, then used infused liquid in other recipes

3. Lavender as Dried Herb

Substitute in recipes where you would normally use herbs such as
Rosemary or Thyme

Easy Recipes:

Lavender Lemonade
Lavender Lemon-Ginger Dressing
Lavender Roasted Beets
Lavender Roasted Potatoes
Lavender Scones

Lavender Festivals occur all over the country. A couple of them that I know about are:

Here in Sonoma County, California, Sonoma Lavender will have its Lavender Festival Saturday and Sunday, June 14 and 15. It's a small festival put on by one grower, but I've been going for years and I always learn something new. That's where I had Lavender Lemonade for the first time and it was sublime. It not only refreshes, but relaxes you. You feel like you've had a glass of wine, but no alcohol so no need for a designated driver, Ha! ha! I do make a Lavender Rosemary Cordial, which contains vodka and brandy, but that's another story.

The Lavender Festival in Sequim, Washington is huge. I hope to go up there this year.

In Sequim, Washington, the Lavender Festival will be Friday, Saturday and Sunday, July 18, 19 & 20.

Thank you George Lucas

2008-05-26T12:39:00.000-07:00

I have not had T.V. since 1994. I live in an area without cable and so the only way to have it would be to get a satellite. Since I don't want to watch enough to make it worthwhile to pay for the service, I don't have it. Instead, I rent DVDs of movies or series that interest me. Besides, in all my adult years of T.V. watching there were few shows that I really liked. Mostly, it was passing time. One of my all time favorites was The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles, which didn't last long (most of the time the shows I liked lasted 1 season or less before they were pulled). Due to the fact that a fourth Indiana Jones movie was about to be released, I was reminded of my fav show and wondered if it was available on DVD. YES!!! and for sale at that. I purchased the 3 volume set and have been enjoying it ever since. In addition to the episodes (most of them I never got to see) there is an extensive amount of educational material. This is a set of DVDs you can't miss. Entertaining and educational, it covers the early part of the 20th century including history, scientific breakthroughs, art, music, social life, inventions and so much more. Historic figures like Lawrence of Arabia, Ataturk, and others are featured as well as the discovery of Tut's tomb. A must see and should have, this is the best series that was ever on T.V. in my opinion. So much of what is going on in the Middle East today is the result of what occurred after the end of WWI and this series and the special features, goes into this in detail. Eventhough the series originally came out in the mid-90s, it is totally relevant today, because of current political events. Since the fictional part of the story takes place so long ago, it is timeless. Lucas must have spent a mint making this series. It is beautifully done in every way: locations, costumes, acting, content. I can't praise it enough. This is what T.V. should be. Thank you George Lucas!!!

Sedna is Calling to Us

2008-05-22T15:09:00.000-07:00

Back home from Denver and UAC. So filled with inspiration and information, it will take me awhile to digest it all. The talks that I was most affected by were by Melanie Reinhart, Demetra George, Steven Forrest, Baris Ilhan (from Turkey)and Donna Cunningham, among others. Not possible to have seen them all since there were over 270 sessions and many workshops and other activities. So incredible to be with thousands of astrologers for five days.

A talk by Barbara Schermer, on Sedna, a sea goddess, and her placement in the charts of environmentalists, was very interesting. Sedna's message: "act to save the planet or get ready to leave it". We should all be stewarding some aspect of nature. Transformation through water is a major theme of Sedna's story, as is the value of learning to save yourself rather than expecting anyone else to do it for you.

Throughout the entire conference, I heard no doom and gloom. I heard a lot of encouragement and hope. The final panel discussed their predictions regarding the next president, based on their reading of the charts of the candidates, election day and inauguration day. The complexity of the readings and the high level of the analytical skills of the panelists impressed me. I couldn't help by see how intelligent they are. I thought "how could anyone, even a scientist, walk in here and not acknowledge that these astrologers are serious scholars?"

There were wanna-be astrologers there, too, and their enthusiasm was infectious. People were totally turned on by the experience. As for me, I had healing moments, made "vows", met many new friends, and reconnected with friends made at other conferences.

I spent some quality time with Kim Marie from Evolutionary Astrology. I am looking forward to the upcoming segment "Health and Wellness" will take place in South Dakota in the last summer/early fall.

If you're interested in purchasing an astrology report, a reading by me, or want to purchase astrology software go to my website. You can also purchase software by going to the graphic link at the bottom of this page. Matrix offers many user-friendly software packages as well as software for Tarot and other types of oracles.

On My Way to UAC in Denver

2008-05-12T11:45:00.000-07:00

Getting ready for my trip to the United Astrology Conference "Rockin'the Universe: The 2008-2012 Cycles of Transformation", in Denver, Colo. This is going to be a huge one. Then when I return, I have a booth at "All Things Herbal" in Sebastopol, Sunday, June 15. Currently working on a new line of products - flower essence blends specifically tied to working on Pluto issues. You know Pluto - the one they just demoted from planet to planetoid? Interesting that just before Pluto entered Capricorn, where he may well see the transformation if not the total demise of corporations, some group of 'scientists' decides he's no longer a planet. As if that would change the power of the god of death and transformation. Ha! Anyone who has undergone a Pluto transit (who hasn't?) knows the power of Pluto. You may not have known that's what it was, but if an astrologer looked at your chart, you may have learned about it in retrospect. Among the values of astrology is finding out when these things are about to occur or are occurring so you know what to do to make the most of it. Then, when your world turns upside down you have a little objectivity about it. One of the services I provide is plant-based products to assist you on your path of transformation. In the spirit of Evolutionary Astrology, I am developing a Pluto Essences Line. More than one - twelve to be exact, to address the issues particular to the house placement of Pluto.

Calendula - 2008 Herb of the Year

2008-05-10T12:21:00.000-07:00

Here's an example of a page from my website wisewomenofthewest.com The website also features my hand-made herbal products, astrological services that I provide, and information on subjects, such as the healing qualities of sea weed and black cumin seed.

Every year the International Herb Association chooses an Herb of the Year. This year it's Calendula officinalis. Calendula has so many uses, both culinary and medicinal. It has been used to color and flavor soups, cheese and butter - thus the name "pot marigold". Traditionally the dried leaves were used as a saffron substitute.

Medicinally, Calendula officinalis is anti-inflammatory, astringent, anti-fungal, and it promotes wound healing. Calendula may be used safely whenever there is inflammation on the skin whether due to infection or physical damage. It may be applied for any external bleeding, bruising or sprains. It is of benefit for slow-healing wounds and is an ideal first-aid treatment for minor burns. Since it is in the Asteraceae family, it may be an allergen for those with that kind of sensitivity.

Taken from: Medical Herbalism: The Science and Practice of Herbal Medicine, by David Hoffmann.

Calendula is featured in two easy to find and informative magazines: The Herb Companion which has a great article. Here are some of the recipes:

calendula cornmeal crisps
banana cake with calendula
maple cream cheese frosting
egg salad with calendula and chives

The other great magazine is: The Herb Quarterly

A great little book that is all about calendula by Mindy Green is: Calendula, one of the series by Keats Publishing, Inc. 1998. One from the series is called: A Keats Good Herb Guide.
Some great recipes from the book:

simple calendula rice
calendula cheese ball
calendula salad dressing
calendula ice cream
calendula cardamom custard
orange whipped cream

Fatima the Spinner and the Tent

2008-05-08T12:54:00.000-07:00

For all those who still wonder what they will be when they grow up or if they will ever find their calling or their mate, I offer this Sufi story. I first heard it during a Jupiter return many years ago. Caroline Casey on the "Visionary Activist" show on KPFA read it. The story was so inspiring and relevant to my life, that I have taken it on as "my story". Interestingly, after hearing this, I actually did go to "The Farthest West" (Morocco), Alexandria (Egypt), Crete and Istanbul. I have yet to go to Java or China, but who knows?

Once in a city in the Farthest West there lived a girl called Fatima. She was the daughter of a prosperous spinner. One day her father said to her: ‘Come, daughter; we are going on a journey, for I have business in the islands of the Middle Sea. Perhaps you may find some handsome youth in a good situation whom you could take as husband.’

They set off and travelled from island to island, the father doing his trading while Fatima dreamt of the husband who might soon be hers. One day, however, they were on the way to Crete when a storm blew up, and the ship was wrecked. Fatima, only half-conscious, was cast up on the seashore near Alexandria. Her father was dead, and she was utterly destitute.

She could only remember dimly her life until then, for her experience of the shipwreck, and her exposure in the sea, had utterly exhausted her.

While she was wandering on the sands, a family of cloth-makers found her. Although they were poor, they took her into their humble home and taught her their craft. Thus it was that she made a second life for herself, and within a year or two she was happy and reconciled to her lot. But one day, when she was on the seashore for some reason, a band of slave-traders landed and carried her, along with other captives, away with them.

Although she bitterly lamented her lot, Fatima found no sympathy from the slavers, who took her to Istanbul and sold her as a slave.

Her world had collapsed for the second time. Now it chanced that there were few buyers at the market. One of them was a man who was looking for slaves to work in this wood yard, where he made masts for ships. When he saw the dejection of the unfortunate Fatima, he decided to buy her, thinking that in this way, at least, he might be able to give her a slightly better life than if she were bought by someone else.

He took Fatima to his home, intending to make her a serving-maid for his wife. When he arrived at the house, however, he found that he had lost all his money in a cargo which had been captured by pirates. He could not afford workers, so he, Fatima and his wife were left alone to work at the heavy labour of making masts.

Fatima, grateful to her employer for rescuing her, worked so hard and so well that he gave her her freedom, and she became his trusted helper. Thus it was that she became comparatively happy in her third career.

One day he said to her: ‘Fatima, I want you to go with a cargo of ships’ masts to Java, as my agent, and be sure that you sell them at a profit.’

She set off, but when the ship was off the coast of China a typhoon wrecked it, and Fatima found herself again cast up on the seashore of a strange land. Once again she wept bitterly, for she felt that nothing in her life was working in accordance with expectation. Whenever things seemed to be going well, something came and destroyed all her hopes.

‘Why is it,' she cried out, for the third time, ’that whenever I try to do something it comes to grief: Why should so many unfortunate things happen to me?’ But there was no answer. So she picked herself up from the sand, and started to walk inland.
Now it so happened that nobody in China had heard of Fatima, or knew anything about her troubles. But there was a legend that a certain stranger, a woman, would one day arrive there, and that she would be able to make a tent for the Emperor. And, since was as yet nobody in China who could make tents, everyone looked upon the fulfillment of this prediction with the liveliest anticipation.

In order to make sure that this stranger, when she arrived, would not be missed, successive Emperors of China had followed the custom of sending heralds, once a year, to all the towns and villages of the land, asking for any foreign woman to be produced at Court.

When Fatima stumbled into a town by the Chinese seashore, it was one such occasion. The people spoke to her through an interpreter, and explained that she would have to go to see the Emperor.
‘Lady,’ said the Emperor, when Fatima was brought before him, ‘can you make a tent?’
‘I think so,’ said Fatima.
She asked for rope, but there was none to be had. So, remembering her time as a spinner, she collected flax and made ropes. Then she asked for stout cloth, but the Chinese had none of the kind which she needed. So, drawing on her experience with the weavers of Alexandria, she made some stout tent cloth. Then she found that she needed tent-poles, but there were none in China. So Fatima, remembering how she had been trained by the wood-fashioner of Istanbul, cunningly made stout tent-poles. When these were ready, she racked her brains for the memory of all the tents she had seen in her travels: and lo, a tent was made.

When this wonder was revealed to the Emperor of China, he offered Fatima the fulfillment of any wish she cared to name. She chose to settle in China, where she married a handsome prince, and where she remained in happiness, surrounded by her children, until the end of her days.

It was through these adventures that Fatima realized that what had appeared to be an unpleasant experience at the time, turned out to be an essential part of the making of her ultimate happiness.

From Tales of the Dervishes, by Indries Shah

Seven Rose Heart Chakra Rubs and Chocolate Mermaids

2008-04-30T17:13:00.000-07:00

Once again, time has been flying by and I have not posted. Was busy getting ready for a craft fair at the Harvest for the Hungry benefit Plant Sale . Ended up doing very well. The top seller of the day being my "seven rose heart chakra rubs" see website:
www.wisewomenofthewest.com.
I also went for a day trip to the U.C. Davis Botanical Gardens with the Sonoma County Master Gardeners.
In two weeks, I'm off to the UAC in Denver, The United Astrology Conference titled: "Rockin' the Universe: The 2008-2012 Cycles of Transformation". This is a huge conference with 5 days of sessions for a total of 18, with 15 different speakers presenting for each session. It reminds me of the AAA (American Anthropological Association) conferences I used to go to back in another lifetime. That feels like a million years ago. These days, it's astrology and plant spirit healing for me. Then, May 30th, I'll reach one of the big ones when I turn "60"!!! Never thought I'd live this long (wasn't sure I wanted to), but so far so good. Even though I just had surgery on my eyelid today and had to wear an eye patch (I asked the doctor to put on a black one so I could fulfill my pirate fantasy), I am in very good shape for the shape I'm in. Two weeks later, I will be doing the "All Things Herbal" herb/craft show Father's Day in Sebastopol in association with the Sebastopol Farmer's Market. This is sponsored by the Sonoma County Herb Association.

The summer is shaping up. No big trips planned although I'm open to the possibility. I am also working on a line of flower essence blends that will focus on Pluto issues. 'Got a download' to do this, in conjunction with the Evolutionary Astrology training program. And now we are full circle. The seven rose heart chakra rubs were made in response to a similar 'download'. I get messages to make something and often I don't even know what it's for. I follow instructions. Then I package it and offer it for sale at my booth. Fine, great. But when people ask me "What's it for?" They want an answer. I have several. Doesn't my mission statement include "handmade herbal products with a story"? Lately, I have not been afraid to give more of the story. To include the part about getting downloads from Spirit. No one flinches. In fact, they seem relieved. The Universe sighs....Ah ...."thank you for acknowledging us". It's getting more okay to say stuff like this because people are hungry for it. The reality we have agreed on is becoming too limiting. People crave enchantment, magic, mystery. "The Quest" is a strong archetype in our psyches and we really don't want to think we have all the answers. "Years ago", as my relatives used to say, there was a very popular movie "What's It All About Alfie?" with a title song that went with it. I don't remember much about the movie except bits of the song. The point is - we need to believe, imagine, fantasize in order to continue to want to get up every day. Why else would fantasy be such a popular genre for books and film? This is one reason why I don't connect much to doomsday scenarios. True, we have done horrendus things to the planet and we are beginning to reap the consequences. It was our rational minds that got us into this fix and as Einstein said “We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” For fear of sounding like my late Mother, who often called herself "an ostrich living with her head in the sand", bless her heart, I will say this, I prefer miracles. I prefer to ask God/Goddess/Spirit/All that is, to help us. Caroline Casey says the gods are very willing to help us - all we have to do is ask.

West Meets East

2008-04-18T13:53:00.000-07:00

Just finished reading an interesting article in Saudi Aramco World called "East Meets West in Venice", which is about the trade relations between Venice and the Middle East beginning in the eighth century. Camel caravans from all over the middle east, would come to Alexandria, Egypt and merchandise would be loaded onto boats, which sailed all over the Mediterranean. Once again, I see examples of the many ways Europe has interacted with the Middle East and how little was written about this in the history books I grew up with. Did I say "how little"? I should have said "nothing". (By the way, the magazine mentioned above is available through a free subscription and you can access all their articles and back issues through the website). It is a magazine whose stated goal is to increase cross-cultural understanding by broadening knowledge of the cultures, history, and geography of the Arab and Muslim worlds and their connections to the West. I have been reading it for several years and have never detected any political or ideological agenda. It is very informative.

One issue that stands out was on the
roots of Blues music in America. If you follow the link you can listen to recordings of the athaan (Islamic call to prayer) and a traditional African-American song that are remarkably similar.

While the article about Venice is titled East Meets West..... I think the issue is rather that we in "the West", especially in America, have no idea of "the East". We have been living in a glass bubble of isolation. In general, we have no idea of what goes on in the rest of the world, we know almost nothing about history, and we don't seem to care. Until 9/11, few people even knew a thing about Islam or the Middle East. Because of our ignorance and apathy, the media was able to feed us what they wanted us to eat. We were led along like sheep, controlled by our "leaders". In the "richest country in the world", we have gone to sleep.

My time in Zaire, Africa in the Peace Corps was a wake-up call for me. My students walked several hours to school. If they brought food with them, they ate. There was no food on campus. They stayed on campus for many hours a day. If they were fortunate enough to live on campus in a dormitory, they shared one room with 4 to 6 others. They had no water or electricity most of the time. There were few books or magazines available. No media to speak of. Yet, their desire for knowledge was so great and the value they put on learning was so high, that when they did get a book, they memorized it. They knew all the States in the U.S., their capital cities, their major geographical features. Before I went there, I had never heard of Zaire. When I got my acceptance letter from Peace Corps, I had to go to an atlas to see where it was. It is now called by its historical name of Congo. My students taught themselves languages with one book, just in case they got a chance to speak to someone from that country. They all spoke at least 4 or 5 languages. Having worked in university libraries in the States, I knew how few students ever even went into the library, let alone checked out books and read them. Forget memorizing. It shamed me to realize that although we have so many resources at our fingertips, most people are complacent, lazy and uninterested in knowing anything beyond what is on T.V. People who only read the newspaper, consider themselves "readers".

California used to be known as having the best educational system in the States. This is no longer true. Most people blame government - Local, State, or Federal. That is not right. If you must blame someone or something, blame the fact that we as a culture do not actually value education. What we value is making money and God knows that has nothing to do with education. In fact, having advanced degrees often works against you in the job market. I can't tell you how many jobs I didn't get because I was "over-qualified". Yet, when I went through a bad time in my life and tried to get general assistance as a temporary measure, I was told I had too much education and thus was not destitute enough because I could get a high paying job. I have never had a high paying job. Meanwhile a family member, with one year of junior college, is making millions. Even though years ago, one of my goals was to be a university professor, and I started a doctoral program, I soon realized that all I would be doing was contributing to the problem - educating more people who would be unemployable in our current system or "under-employed" people with advanced degrees working at the post office. I did teach at the university level through extension programs where people took classes they were really interested in - for fun. That was delightful.

Or you can blame the students who don't care and are not interested in learning. Learning has nothing to do with teachers, resources, buildings, or even diet for that matter. For those who value knowledge and learnng, nothing can stop them. They don't do it because they think they will make more money. They do it because they are curious, interested, inspired. I saw this first hand in Zaire. They had a burning desire to know about the world, not just their neighborhood. For most of them, there would be no advantage in having an education except to enrich their own mind. How to motivate people to open their minds and ask questions, that is the challenge.

Coursing the Chart

2008-04-11T18:32:00.000-07:00

I have started working with clients toward certification as a Flower Essence Practitioner. The essences are powerful and transformative. I also use astrology to help in identifying the issues and setting intentions. People are often not aware of core issues - if they were, they probably wouldn't need to call on a practitioner in the first place. There might just be a sense that something is wrong and they want you to tell them what it is. Well, that is not what I do. Rather, I witness the other person's process, offering the tools that I have experience with. Among those tools is Astrology. Whether you have a "live reading" or a personalized report (see my website
www.wisewomenofthewest.com
to order a report from a famous astrologer) astrology can provide insight into answering the question of why we are here and what we are here to do. As I see it, ultimately, we are all on a path toward greater coherence. How we get there depends on our "map". The chart is the map. (Ever wonder why boat maps are called charts?) The navigational symbol on a map is called a "compass rose".
For an article about it see origin of the compass rose . And what you may well ask, does this have to do with.....? Well, the study of history will reveal the relatedness of things. The early scientists who invented the navigational tools, were also astronomer/astrologers. No separation. Imagine that!

The word resonance has been coming up a lot for me recently. It feels good. It feels right. To become resonant with the Divine as it manifests in the natural world. Ahhhh Vibrating together - coherent. These words are definitely striking a chord. Pam Montgomery's book Plant Spirit Healing with a foreward by Stephen Harrod Buhner who wrote: The Secret Teachings of Plants and Sacred Plant Medicine, two magical books on the plant messengers and our relationship to plants. The information that the heart is the primary organ of perception and actually comes into being before the brain, is marvelous. Ya Hu

Teachings from Buttercup

2008-04-07T12:02:00.000-07:00

Last weekend I attended a workshop by Pam Montgomery author of Plant Spirit Healing: A Guide to Working with Plant Consciousness given at California School of Herbal Studies in Forestville, California. Each of us in the workshop were selected by a plant, in my case, Buttercup. An unassuming little flower that I also saw recently in Mexico. One that most people recognize, no matter how little they know about plants. You are walking along and there she is. Her spirit has been with me for a couple of days and nights now. With petals that are both shiny, reflecting light, and irridescent, giving off light, she is like a tiny mirror. Happily bobbing on delicate stems, she appears to be dancing in the wind. Her message for me was that one of the greatest things we can do is to show other people how beautiful they are. Reflect the light of others. I later went to the reference book for the Flower Essence Society, the Flower Essence Repertory, by Patricia Kaminski and Richard Katz, which said, the positive qualities of buttercup are: "radiant inner light, unattached to outer recognition or fame". I was not surprised because I have often found when working with plants. They tell you what they are for. These days we can be caught up in the "Hollywood" mentality which is all around us. We all want recognition, fame and (admit it) fortune. But Nature gives us everything, everyday, for "nothing". All She wants or needs is our gratitude. That is the one thing we need to do in return. Give thanks. Spiritual traditions all over the world, share this concept of giving thanks. Whether it be to God or to Nature, it is to the Creation. Gratitude puts our heart in coherence with the Universe, connecting us. And this is what we must do to heal ourselves and the planet. Every day and Now.

Small World

2008-04-04T11:40:00.000-07:00

Just got a new book by Pam Montgomery, Plant Spirit Healing: A Guide to Working with Plant Consciousness. I'm reading as fast as I can because this coming weekend I will be taking a 2 day class with her at California School of Herbal Studies. Over 20 years ago, when I lived in New Orleans, I heard about CSHS. I wished I was back in California so I could attend. "Things happened" and I found myself back in California. When I moved into my current home, I had no idea that I was living 5 minutes from the school. The plants conspired not only place to me where I am, but also to provide me with the means to be able to go to classes there. Yesterday, when I went to register for the up-coming class, I told Jason that I had just returned from La Cruz Huanacaxtle and he said yes, he knew it well. He and his family winter near there every year. More and more I understand that finding your true path, is as much about listening and following your nose, as anything else. These days there are many books written about the subject of one's purpose, calling, right work, etc. To some extent, this attention to the subject puts pressure on people to "do something about it". To this end, they buy books, go to workshops, attend trainings and pay people to help them. I too, have done some of these things. Fast approaching 60, I begin to believe that "finding your true path" is inevitable. What else could you do? What the issue actually is - is having the patience and the certainty that it will happen. Not necessarily when you want it to happen, but when it is supposed to happen. Our true path is our life unfolding. How else could it possibly be? Just as we could never begin to control all the functions and actions of our own body, what makes us think we could "find" then "execute" the plan for our life? It's not that I think we have no choices. Rather I believe it is bigger than what our mind can conceive of. There are more beings involved. The plants for example. Maybe they have a plan for us. For my own part, the more I have dedicated myself to my relationship with the plant kingdom, the more my life has made sense and the happier I have been. The evolutionary relationship between plants and animals is extremely interesting. The plants have led, the animals have followed. Without plants making food for us out of sunlight, water and CO2, no animal could live. Think about it. "Little green men" (chloroplasts) trapped inside the plant cells, perform an alchemical transformation of energy into matter. Did they go to a seminar to find the true calling? To see what I'm up to go see my website at www.wisewomenofthewest.com

La Corazon

2008-03-26T13:26:00.000-07:00

Here I am in Mexico again. This time to help Glenn with surgery. We are actually in the small town of La Cruz Huanacaxtle at the north end of Banderas Bay where Glenn and La Sirena (his schooner) are in the La Cruz Marina. The town is named for the cross at the center of town made of huanacaxtle wood. It is the perfect place to have heart-related surgery, because being here as a gringo, one sees just what is missing from the culture we come from - The Heart. Despite the fact that these people are being invaded by the new marina (which is being built to dock 500 boats thus nearly doubling the population of the town); the new condos going in; the hotels that are being planned; they are gentle, smiling and caring for us, the strangers that will soon ruin the town. Glenn has been here 4 months and already the locals know him and care about him. When they saw him with his arm in a sling, they asked what happened and seemed to really care when they heard the answer. Children walk freely, unafraid. Their faces are open and innocent. They smile at strangers as if they were family. I feel like an alien sometimes, not because of the way they treat me, but because of my own lack of humanity. More and more expatriots are moving here from the States, Canada and Europe. Will we bring our sickness of the heart with us too? Or will we instead entrain to their hearts which in the long run, are stronger than ours.

Flower Power

2008-03-11T14:25:00.000-07:00

Recently I went to see Thomas Moore at the Church of the Incarnation in Santa Rosa, sponsored by Copperfield's Books. I was inspired by his talk. His most recent book, A Life at Work: The Joy of Discovering What You Were Born to Do, says that finding a life's work is an alchemical process that leaves nothing out. All elements of your life, including the failures and disappointments go into the mix. He illustrated his talk with the story of Rapunzel, who ended up in a tower due to a compromise her father was forced to make with a sorceress. This got my attention, since I played Rapunzel in a Girl Scout play when I was 11. He makes the analogy between early success in your work life and being locked in a tower. That is, sometimes success keeps you from growing and moving forward to what you really were meant to do. For those of us who are still wondering what we will do when we grow up, this is a relief. I can see now that if some of my earlier jobs had not been so unsatisfactory, I would have stayed. The first book of his that I read was The Re-enchantment of Everyday Life, so the dedication he wrote in my copy of his new book: "Do your magic, make us an enchanted world", brought me joy. I had just remembered something wonderful about my childhood. I used to spend hours outside with the plants and flowers - playing with the flowers, talking to them (as I still do today). "An only child" I never felt lonely and now I know why - I was surrounded by all the plant beings! I had a vision of myself in the midst of a whole world of smiling flower faces. Moore says we cannot forget how our past is a part of us. Rather we should mine it for all its worth. Re-examine our past and see if our relationship to it changes. It has taken me all these years to remember that I have always been connected to "flower power". No wonder Flower Essences and Essential Oils - Flower Therapy - appeals so much to me. I am seeking certification as a flower essence practitioner. I need a number of case studies. If you would like to be included in my study, please leave a comment with your email and I will get in touch with you. Best if we can meet in person at least once. So... near Santa Rosa or the Bay Area only, unless you are traveling this way.

Across the Universe

2008-02-25T08:54:00.000-08:00

Finally got to see the movie "Across the Universe" on DVD. Wish I had seen it in the theater at least once. It was "trippy". A real stroll down memory lane. I cried with every song. I remembered when each song came out and what I was doing and thinking. I realized that was 40 years ago and more. I remember when I saw the Beatles in 1964 at the Cow Palace in San Francisco with my cousins Frank and George (Frank's younger brother), my aunt Frances and my Mom, Katie. I don't remember if anyone else was with us. I was 16. Imagine going to something like that with your mother! Things have changed. We didn't think it was strange. We were happy they took us. When the Beatles came out everyone started screaming and jumping up and down, even our mothers! I made my way through the crowd and actually started climbing on to the stage, reaching for John. He was closest to the side I was on, although Paul was my favorite. A female cop grabbed me an threatened to take me to the infirmary if I tried it again. Of course, I obeyed. In the west, popular music defines an era. The Beatles were a huge part of my younger days. The film uses their music effectively and appropriately. Earlier in the day, I had gone to a reading and book signing by Natalie Goldberg. She said she has been earning a living writing for 21 years. She's written 11 books. Her latest one Old Friend from Far Away. She talked about how a memoir could cover a part of your life. It was not a chronological account, but, say, your life in terms of lemon-meringue pie. This film shows how our lives were interwoven with the music of the Beatles. How it defined a generation. From the naivete of "I Want to Hold Your Hand" to "Why Don't We Do It in the Road". We all changed a lot in one decade. The whole world changed a lot in that decade.

On the Way to Enlightenment

2008-02-18T11:54:00.000-08:00

For my readers, please forgive some of the strange ads that are appearing these days. The device they give us to screen and delete these ads is not working right now, so... Sorry! Perhaps that's because of Mercury Retrograde. Wow! I had no idea so much time went by since my last post! Well, you know what they say about time. I've been taking two on-line courses that take way-too-much-time (Powerpoint and Dreamweaver). My website www.wisewomenofthewest.com is continually evolving and growing and these programs will take it to a whole new level. I've also been "having fun" doing things way outside my comfort zone and expanding myself out into the world. One thing is the Enlightened Entrepreneurs Intensive training by Edward Mills. That is definitely pushing my buttons, (yes, I still have buttons) and Jane Bell's Flower Essence Practitioner Training which is moving things around in my psyche and emotional center. I guess it's time for inner-work again and flower essences can certainly do that. I had quite an experience Saturday with a colony of deep orange flowers and a hummingbird. Marvelous! Hummingbird has special significance in the indigenous religions of Mexico and since I am currently expanding my life into Mexico, it was a gift to have that encounter.

Wise Men I Know

2008-02-04T13:10:00.001-08:00

Yes, as I said before, I am for harmony and balance. I gotta tell you about my cousin Frank. At 60 he ran his first marathon last year in Las Vegas and loved it so much he's doing it again this year. Here he is at the beginning of the race where it's 32 degrees!!! It was a fund raiser for the SF AIDS Foundation and he raised way more than expected. When he wrote me and said "I am training for the 2008 San Francisco Marathon. It is a fund raiser for the SF AIDS Foundation. For more info click on the web link
SF Marathon", I couldn't believe it. This guy has discipline! He's been working out for at least 25 years or something.
Here he is at the end of the marathon last year - 26 miles!!! .
I bet he's warmed up now. He has always been special to me. Better than a brother, a best friend. As kids we saw every horror movie they made. One time we saw a double-feature (yeah, we could see a double-feature for a quarter) "Giant Gila Monsters" and "Attack of the Monster Shrews" or something like that, 3 times each before our mothers picked us up. Usually we just went on our own, but that time they had dropped us off and told us to stay there until they came back. They had a flat-tire or something and it took hours. No cell phones then. We knew the dialog by heart. In high school we both loved to dance and danced together because nobody else knew how. We belonged to a square dance club and went roller-skating. In our twenties we went to Hawaii and Canada. He was in my wedding. He taught me about the Law of Attraction before it was popular. He has always been a positive "can do, will do" guy and I will always love him. Good Luck Frank!

Eek! I'm Turning into a Geek!

2008-01-28T13:21:00.000-08:00

Yes, I'm afraid it's true. Although there are those who might say I've always been one. The word did not exist when I was in high school, nor did the word 'nerd' for that matter. How old is she? you are probably asking yourself at this point. Well, let's just say when I was in high school, I was in the "smart" class and most of the guys in that class were definitely what I would call nerds. I guess that made me one too. So what's happening now? I'm taking 3 on-line classes from Santa Rosa Junior College, and between those and all the other things I have going on, I think I spend at least 10 hours a day or more, on a computer at home. I am hoping to learn enough Dreamweaver to put up my own website because the platform I am currently using is so inflexible and I want to improve the appearance. I have many plans for www.wisewomenofthewest.com . Might I add that you can now purchase some of my herbal products and several different astrology reports from there using PayPal. I have had to schedule "days off" now that I work from home since I am actually working more now than ever. But I love the flexibility of being able to eat when I wish and wear what I want. That was always a problem for me. I am a grazer and like to nibble small amounts of food throughout the day. Most jobs have a "lunch hour" usually a half-hour in which you must force-feed yourself in order to stay alive. And the breakfast thing was also a problem. I just can't eat when I get up in the morning. I need time to see what I want to put on my stomach. When you work "in the world", you either don't eat at all or you make yourself eat something to "start your day right". Let's not get into the issues I always had with the bathroom, except to say that my last job as a Letter Carrier was a real doozy in that department. Out on the route as a Rural Carrier, I had to find places in the woods. As a City Carrier, I sometimes had to ask people to let me in their house. That is really embarrassing and if you deliver mail in a neighborhood where everyone is away at work, man, you are really in trouble. Since you can't "deviate" from the route, you can't get in your truck and drive to a public bathroom. So, again, you have to closely monitor your food and beverage intake so that you won't have to "go" for the several hours you are out on the route. I wonder how many Letter Carriers end up with bladder and colon problems? Hmmm, I wonder if anyone is doing research on that one? Oh, I'm so glad those days are over. Now, back to my .....

Wise Women I Have Met

2008-01-14T16:39:00.000-08:00

As you may have noticed if you've been following this blog, I write about a number of subjects. It's just the beginning. As the title of the blog and my website www.wisewomenofthewest indicate, I am interested in empowering women (not at the expense of men), but as a step toward the balance that needs to occur for human beings to move towards harmony with Nature. In tune with empowering women, I want to tell you about Deanna L'am who I met at our Joy Road Fall Art Walk and Sale in Occidential. She was with her delightful daughter, who sort of reminded me of myself at her age. Deanna is a wise woman if ever there was one. She has a beautiful website at www.deannalam.com. And a new book out:
Becoming Peers - Mentoring Girls into Womanhood, (Red Moon Publishing, soft cover, 168 pages).

New Year's Revolutions

2008-01-12T14:38:00.000-08:00

Back from Puerto Vallarta, Mexico, where I got a chance to practice my Spanish for a change. We went to Guadalajara (another "Spanish" word that comes from Arabic), for a few days and I loved the area known as Tlaquepaque. I could have spent a lot more time there. As for New Year's Resolutions, I usually don't bother to make them since I am continuously checking in with myself to see what I'm up to and how it fits into my goals. I have launched both this blog and my website www.wisewomenofthewest.com and they are starting to have a life of their own so I plan to spend more time working on them. I just heard from Edward Mills www.evolvingtimes.com about a great blogging class.

I'm evaluating a

multi-media course on blogging from the folks at Simpleology. For a while, they're letting you snag it for free if you post about it on your blog.

It covers:

The best blogging techniques.
How to get traffic to your blog.
How to turn your blog into money.

I'll let you know what I think once I've had a chance to check it out. Meanwhile, go grab yours while it's still free.

I can't believe how much my life has changed since I started blogging! It's as if I have connected to a different frequency. My entire outlook on life has shifted. While in Mexico, I made many new friends and may be starting a project that will further change my life. It was real nice being in that 80 degree weather. While lounging in the hot sun, I found out about the huge storm here in Sonoma County. Gee, I'm so sorry I missed it. So... the idea of spending "winter" in Mexico is looking good.

To the Land of Quetzalcoatl

2007-12-22T13:49:00.000-08:00

I'll be going to Puerto Vallarta New Year's Day .
for about 10 days. Glenn and La Sirena (his sailboat) made it down there after a not-so-auspicious start. His engine pooped out just a few miles out of the Golden Gate and he had to be towed in to his first stop at Half Moon Bay. After spending a day driving up and down the peninsula in my car to find parts (good thing I have one - he got rid of both of his vehicles prior to leaving), he was able to fix her and get her going again. Since then it's been smooth sailing.
Now he's in Puerto Vallarta and I'm flying down for a few days. A welcome change from the near freezing cold we've been having here. We will probably go to Guadalajara for a couple days and another small town he stopped in on the way down the coast and loved. Just finished reading 2012: Return of Quetzalcoatl. Interesting "coincidence" that I'll be going to Mexico. The book really got me thinking. Autobiographical at times, scholarly at times, the author is clearly on a search for meaning and purpose. Lots of information and a great bibliography. I'm taking the crop circle thing more seriously after this book.
In fact I'm developing my own theory about many ancient sites like Stonehenge and the Great Pyramid after reading this book. Another "coincidence": I finished the book and two days later got my latest copy of Archaeology Magazine with the cover story about Stonehenge! Daniel Pinchbeck writes extensively about his experiences in England visiting the ancient sites and crop circles that appeared while he was there. Like Pinchbeck, I have pursued many paths and done a great deal of research on seemingly strange subjects (not to me, but to my family). I have wondered from time-to-time why I have done this. Certainly not to make money, because until now, I have made very little from these pursuits. If anything, what I was learning made it harder to live and work within the current system because I could not perceive any "magic" or "soul" there. I felt called, led by the information itself like following a pied-piper. Pinchbeck writes a lot about how our concepts and structures of time affect the way we think. Since I studied for a doctorate in Mayan Studies many years ago, I was curious about this book because I dreaded one more wacko book on the Maya. To his credit, he includes the wacko and the academic (which to some, may be even more wacko). Perspective changes everything. He asks many questions and gives answers from many points of view without dictating any solution. He does give a convincing argument for both the need for a change of consciousness and the evidence that the change is occurring. My website: www.wisewomenofthewest.com continues to evolve.

Breathe, take a walk, open your eyes....

2007-12-11T11:04:00.000-08:00

Well that last one was a bit of a rant. I guess the point I was making indirectly is that during this time, pay attention to flares of temper. Even those who think they have a level of self-knowledge and a tiny bit of mastery may have a "reaction" during this time. It could manifest on the physical level as well. In fact, the more "controlled" you are on the outside, the more likely you will have a physical manifestation - such as sudden unexplained physical symptoms. Just pay attention - our relationship to those areas of life affected by energy, will, desire, and drive are up for review until the end of January. It might look something like the two-year-old stomping her foot and saying "No!" Use this time to make constructive, positive changes in your life. Or simply take a break until it's over. For those of you who get caught up in the Christmas frenzy, this might be more difficult. For my part, I have decided to step back from working on my website. I have "hit a wall" in terms of what I can do on my own. I'm getting help tomorrow. I feel such a strong urge to "make it happen" and initial success gave me a false sense of confidence, but now I have reached my limit and have to get input from others who know more than me. Breathe, take a walk in nature or simply open your eyes and look around you. It's all a matter of perception.
My website (still under construction) www.wisewomenofthewest.com
Astrology is a tool for self-awareness. It doesn't tell you what to do but it can assist you in your own process of development and transformation.

Mars Retrograde

2007-12-08T11:40:00.000-08:00

I don't know about you, but what's happening for me is: 1)I'm having a real hard time finding a reason to do things. Right now I feel like nothing matters. This is partly the effect of the Pluto and Jupiter conjunction in Sagittarius , but also now, Mars retrograde is taking all the energy out of what I have found meaningful lately; 2)Not telling people off, but setting limits as to what they can say to me and how I want them to relate to me. This is due in part to Saturn crossing my Ascendant, but it is also about changing my definition of friendship (Mars is in my 11th house right now). I have felt that most of my friends have not treated me as an equal but rather as somehow inferior to them. I have allowed this by asking for their advice and seeking their approval. Now I don't care what they think or if they even want to talk to me again. I feel I have been "boot-licking" so they would like me. That's over. One of the marvelous things that is happening is a lot of synchronicity. I turn on the radio and they are doing a program on what I have been thinking about. A friend (yes, I still have some) will start talking about a book that seems to be "right up my alley". I've just started reading 2012: Return of Quetzalcoatl. Since I was working on a Ph.D. in Mayan Studies many years ago, I am particularly sensitive to all the hype about "the end of the world" stuff that people talk about in regards to this date. I will write more about this later. So far, the book is engaging and I'll let you know when I finish it. Also in Astrology Class the other night, the person whose chart we were reading was so much like me it was eerie. He talked about a book called Denial of Death by Ernest Becker, which was published in the 70's and seems to mirror many of my thoughts about society. I ordered it on-line and it should be here in a few days. It promises to be juicy.

Jupiter-Pluto Conjunction

2007-11-28T19:25:00.000-08:00

The last time Jupiter and Pluto were in conjunction in Sagittarius was November 10, 1758. This time it will be on December 11, 2007 at 28º24'. On top of that, Mars is retrograde in Cancer going back into Gemini. To some of you this means something, to others it doesn't. For those of you who don't know and don't care, forget the following information. For those who know and those who want to know, I suggest you read Shelley L. Ackerman's article called "Great Balls of Fire! The Big Bang Jupiter-Pluto Conjunction of 2007", in The Mountain Astrologer, Dec/Jan 2008.
For a personal chart reading go to my website: www.wisewomenofthewest.com/. What this conjunction means to me is that the "chickens are coming home to roost" as my mother would say. It's a sort of "check-in" time or maybe a "check-out" time. It's report card time. I consider myself to be a Plutonian type. My Pluto is conjunct Saturn in the 12th house and my South Node is in Scorpio. That's one reason why even though my Sun is in "sunny" Gemini, I am an intense person who has had "an interesting life". I've done some things even men wouldn't do (sky dive) and I've had to do some things no one should have to do in the "land of the free". I am able to hold paradox within me. That is, while I am on a spiritual path of love, I acknowledge the shadow within myself and others. I am not an "air head" or a "light weight". I believe darkness exists and we can learn from it. Pretending or faking it doesn't work. We have some challenging days ahead. I do believe in the Law of Attraction and that what we focus on we manifest. Now that we've all been through countless workshops, meditated for years, or whatever else has floated our spiritual boat, it's time to make it real folks. Put it into practice. As Caroline Myss would say "have a backbone not a wishbone". When I was a child of 10, we practiced nuclear attack drills at school and learned about "smog". That was a long time ago. My generation never expected to grow up much less become seniors (as we are now). My friends and I talked about the end of the world a lot. My answer was (I was a mystic in the making), "Everything will be okay because peoples' minds will change, they will think differently. I don't know how or what, but I know it will happen." I didn't know the word consciousness then or about the 100th monkey thing or the collective unconscious.... But I did know that change would have to come at the level of consciousness and that it would come. Be the change you want to see. You'll see it when you believe it.

Web site in process

2007-11-24T10:53:00.000-08:00

I have been working on my website www.wisewomenofthewest.com/ all week and even though I'm using templates, it's still challenging. The frustration factor is high. Software programs can do 50,000 things, but the one thing you want them to do, forget it. I could be out there fighting traffic and crowds in the annual rush to outdo yourself and your friends, known as "Christmas Shopping"! I either do it all year long or give my products. Now that my line of herbal products, and cordials has expanded so much, there's a lot to choose from. The website is started and there is still a lot to do. As for this blog, you might have noticed that some of the ads are wonky and some of them are selling questionable products. This is not my doing and I have to monitor daily to see what they've come up with. I will probably be switching to another location soon. I will keep you posted.

Ah! Monday

2007-11-19T13:10:00.000-08:00

Last week I was so busy getting ready for our third annual Joy Road Art Walk and Craft Sale in Occidental, I didn't have time to do any posting. I did read an interesting blog - http://www.todolistblog.blogspot.com/ with a posting called "110 Things to do Before He Dies". It's down the page a bit but worth looking at. I think most of us have made such a list even if it was just in our heads. How many of those things have you gotten to do? Send me a list or comment with 5 things you wanted to do in your life and then actually did. Then tell me 5 you still want to do. I think its good to check it with oneself from time to time. It's a way to call attention to our lives and what we're doing. In the modern world we have more choices than ever and even if we feel stuck in something, we can still change our attitude about it. I have found that when I changed my mental relationship to something, it changed as well. The material presented in The Secret about the Law of Attraction is real for me and I have had my world change amazingly by changing my thoughts and language. For books on this and other related topics go to the Amazon ad on the page. They are having some incredible deals the day after Thankgiving. One winter after I had had surgery, I had many challenges with my house - problems with the well and a leaky roof. I was not able to work because of my surgery and (oh did you know that state and federal employees cannot get disability pay?) so... no income. My car had blown a cylinder the day after I stopped working before my surgery, so no car. And I didn't have enough money to pay for propane heating. In short, I was cold, in pain and the only reliable water I had was falling on my head from the roof. I did have a mound of yarn. I decided to make ponchos. I sat for hours crocheting. The yarn kept me warm. Rather than feeling sorry for myself (tempting I admit, but not helpful) I realized there were hundreds, maybe thousands of people, maybe hundreds of thousands of people who would give anything to: 1) have a house, 2) be home crocheting rather than being at work, and 3) be alone rather than with the person or persons they were with. I thought of all those people who have so many duties and obligations they never get a moment to themselves. I remembered my days in the Peace Corps and my experiences traveling in "third" world countries where people lived in cardboard shanties. And I thought "Wow, am I lucky!" Happy for what I have rather than what I don't have. I viewd my circumstances from a different point of view. Everything has changed since then. I have two cars now, I am self-employed, and the roof and well got fixed. It's important to monitor your thoughts and your feelings. Meditation and contemplation (not worrying) can help with this. I have also found that all the recordings by Caroline Myss are beneficial for changing one's relationship to their life. Have a great week.

In Gratitude

2007-11-12T12:17:00.000-08:00

Today I want to pay homage to my teachers and to the spiritual path it took me a long time to find. Thirteen years ago today (Nov. 12) I went to my first "Sufi Dance" in Sebastopol, CA and found my home. Being involved with Sufism has been the one thing I have "committed" to (besides going to school) for so long. I have been more or less actively participating with several lineages during that time, but the community is large and flexible and it is not a problem (except in terms of time). I started with a lineage that came from Hazrat Inayat Khan from India, then added one that came from Mevlana Jelaleddin Rumi, who is buried in Konya, Turkey, but who was born elsewhere. Through my connection to Sufism, all my dreams have come true. I was reading a blog this morning about "to do" lists. Throughout my life, I have made lists about things I wanted to do before I die, places I want to go, etc. I have done them all. I also want to pay homage to Marianne Williamson, whose book Return to Love helped me get my priorities straight and get off the path of being a love addict. I'm not saying I'm "there" yet, but now I can see the "Beloved" in everyone, including myself more and more everyday.

The Invisible Woman

2007-11-09T16:06:00.000-08:00

I think it was around 10 years ago when I realized that I wasn't being noticed anymore. I was a fairly attractive woman in my day and always got plenty of attention from men (sometimes unwanted). I knew this would not last. But when it got so that I couldn't even get service in public places, I knew I had joined the ranks of the unseen. One day at a local fund-raiser in town, I went to buy a glass of wine. I knew what I wanted. I was looking attentively at the server with the money in my hand. As I waited my turn, a couple walked up on my right. Before they had even made their selection, the counter person was helping them. I was a bit irritated, but hey, this was a "fund-raiser" for the town park and I wasn't going to make a stink. Then two men came up on my left, and before they knew what they wanted, they got help. THAT WAS IT!!!!! Here I was with my money in my hand and two other sets of people got waited on before me. I said "What's going on here? Do you have to have a d__k to be waited on?" Well.... that got everyone's attention. The counter person hemmed and hawed and helped me. The two guys were red-faced (more embarassed than me). I got my wine. I also learned that even though I was not seen anymore, now that I was "an old lady", I could get away with being strange. I could say just about anything I wanted. I've made the most of that believe me!!

May in Morocco

2007-11-04T14:58:00.000-08:00

Early last May I went to Morocco with a group of herbalists, herb growers, massage therapists, healers, and producers of herbal products. We visited spas, healing retreat centers, herb farms, herbal doctors and even a rose oil distillery.

Here’s our tour leader having a healing footbath. It was inspiring to me since I also grow medicinal plants and create my own herbal products.
I discovered ingredients used traditionally in Morocco, but still not well-known in the United States and have been making my own products with them. Watch for a link to my website where you can find out how to get them.
We also did some of the usual tourist things like ride camels (I love camels). How could anyone ever say that camels are vicious? Isn’t he the sweetest thing you’ve ever seen? We visited the historic kasbah Ait Benhaddou, where they recently filmed a movie.

Did you ever see goats in trees?
Here they are eating argan fruit.

A wonderful oil is made from the nut inside that is used both for cooking and skin care. Whoever came up with the expression “a hard nut to crack” must have been talking about argan. We got to try cracking them at a women’s collective.

Thanks to the French I learned in the Peace Corps many years ago, I was able to talk to the locals. One afternoon, I was talking to the young man who works at the hotel desk. He asked me why, at the height of the season, there were no Americans, besides us, at the hotel. “We built this place especially to cater to American tourists and you’re the only ones here. Why aren’t Americans coming to Morocco anymore?” Part of me was surprised at his naiveté. “You really don’t know why?” “No, not at all. We love Americans.” I felt so bad telling him that to the average American, all Arabic speaking people are the same. Most people think they are all terrorists. Even some of the people in the group I was with were so on edge about something happening, that every normal setback or misunderstanding (common while traveling anywhere) was seen as a deliberate attempt to upset and derail us. He was so sad to hear this. “But don’t they know that Morocco is completely different than that? We don’t want fanaticism here.” “No they don’t know that,” I replied. He said it was my job to tell them. This was my second trip to Morocco. I loved it so much the first time that I wanted to pack up my life and move there. This time was no different. The focus of this trip brought us to more rural areas than I experienced last time and we had a chance to meet and interact with lots of people. I saw how I could live there and perhaps that will be part of my future.

2007-10-31T12:51:00.000-07:00

Road Kill – Stories from the Post Office

Several years ago while I was still a Rural Carrier, I was helping my mom host an Elderhostel event. I never told them what I did for a living since it was irrelevant to my role. One afternoon some of the people were sitting around chatting and someone made a crack about postal workers. Another replied “Well you know, they only hire road kill at the post office”. I wanted to “out” myself right then. Earlier these same people had praised my intelligence and complimented me for my interesting presentation on California history. They were so impressed …Blah, blah, blah. What if they knew I was “road kill” too? I was outraged at the stupidity and insensitivity of such a remark. It was one of those moments in life where you stand there wondering what the right thing to do is. Stand with the underdog or pretend you don’t know him? I said nothing. But to this day I wish I could have set them straight about the incredible job postal workers do – 24/7 all over this country.
I have mixed feelings about my time in the Post Office, but I will say this: nobody knows except one who has done the job, just what it’s all about. Presently, there are nearly a million people working for the U.S. Postal Service as it is known today. Then there are the families and friends, whose lives are affected, not to mention the retirees. I’d like to share stories. Not “going postal” jokes. Although….
I never thought I’d be standing up for the Post Office. Except for one Postmaster, they were not very nice to me. I worked for them for only 8 years. But it was a job I will never forget. I’ve done many jobs in my life, but overall the Post office was the hardest. And strangely enough, the one I miss the most.
The reason I decided to start this blog was that lately, I’ve begun to see how much better things were with snail mail. Having worked for the post office, I appreciated the level of service and the job we did more. The other day, I was creating an email list of customers for my home-based business (I had to do something after the P.O. put me out after getting hit by a car and not being able to do my job anymore – more about that later) so I took the settlement money from the insurance company and started a business. I entered the list, being very careful to type everything right. I had made a point of telling everyone to write legibly – what does that mean in the modern world? – people can barely write at all. Of course I got a mailer daemon. No such address. I thought “XXXX” lost that contact! Then I remembered the post office. We used to get mail addressed to “Grandma Jones on Second St.” There was always someone who knew who that was – usually the carrier for Second St. who went on the same route everyday and knew all his/her customers. All I had to do was sort that envelope to route X and the carrier knew the rest. Not with email. Once it’s gone, it’s gone. No office of dead letters. Sent off into the ozone never to be heard from again. Now how many of you have had snail mail lost? I know there’s a joke about that – but honestly, how often has it really happened? Compare that to how many times you have had email lost. Sometimes it disappears before you even send it. The computer snags up and all is lost. Maybe that’s why email is so short. That’s all you can remember of whatever you planned to say before the computer ate it. I rest my case.
Then just two days ago another snafu that would never happen at the post office. I had ordered some software and it was being delivered by FedEx. Someone had entered my home address incorrectly, leaving off one digit. First FedEx called to say there was no such number on that street. The next day they called to say the courier (sounds more upscale than carrier – as in postal carrier) said all addresses on that street had five digits (getting better). Oh yes, they didn’t leave their phone number. It took me over an hour and several phone calls to get some help. The command center, or whatever they call it, knew my address because it was connected to my phone number, but the local “hub” didn’t have that capability. It should arrive tomorrow – 3 days late. Once again the letter carrier would: 1) have recognized my name; 2) known what the address was supposed to be; and 3) most important – delivered it anyway. So my question to you is – Are things really getting better?
I’d like to hear your postal stories.

Where is Mystery Ranch?

2007-10-14T11:12:00.000-07:00

Mystery ranch is the place we want to be......

In the world we wish to create.....

Someone said "be the changes you want to see" or something like that. Mystery ranch is the world you want to live in. What does it look like for you? We want to show you our world.